Needing prayers- mother-in-law is in pain anytime she is moved and it kills me to be the one to cause the pain!

If she is nearing the end, is it really necessary to be moving her? When my husband was in his 6 week dying process, he was in such excruciating pain, and any touch or movement made him holler out. It was horrible to witness. And sadly with him, none of the pain medication that hospice supplied even touched it. Even when the aides had to bathe him it seemed inhumane to put him through that as it caused him such great pain. He was supposed to get bathed again on a Monday, and I had already decided that if he was still alive, I was going to cancel the aides coming as I just couldn't bear seeing my husband holler out when he was being washed and moved, but that was the morning that the Good Lord took him home to be with Him, never to have to suffer or feel pain again. Thank you Jesus.

You may want to ask hospice to prescribe her medications in liquid form, or they can even put in a midline that would allow you to put her medications directly into her vein. That will make it much easier for her and for you. I'm sorry that you are having to go through this, but know that you will be blessed beyond measure, for taking such good care of your MIL. I am lifting you and her up in prayer right now. God bless you.

When my dad was nearing the end, at home on hospice, he also cried out when he was moved. The hospice nurses told us this wasn’t pain, but a reaction to being disturbed, like being startled from a sound sleep. Dad was peaceful but when we had to change him, reposition him, or do anything with his bedding he’d cry out. It was so very hard to hear, but after watching a bit I came to agree. Also, when he could no longer swallow pills we discontinued them and there was no difference in him. The hospice meds were liquid and easily put in his mouth. I wish you both peace

What kinds of meds are you still giving her that would need to be crushed up? All dad's EOL medications were liquid form, or as a cream (the Ativan). We didn't even try to move him, it hurt so bad.

Mother was frantically grinding up his Lipitor and forcing it down him. I gave her a taste of the concoction she'd made and said "oh, that's so awful"---and WHY was she giving a man in Hospice something for high cholesterol???

The only thing that I could do was dose him with morphine--wait about 15 minutes and do the washing or little bit of movement that he could bear.

My prayers are for sure going out to you. I think we are about to have the same scenario with my mother so I fully understand. I wished I could help more but I can absolutely pray!!

I will keep your MIL in my prayers. My father and brother both had Hospice and they were very comfortable. Both got morphine and Ativan via a syringe.

Thank you fir the prayers, FG. She us resting well tonight.

Slip a folded sheet under her to make it easier to shift her positions. Use pillows to prop her arm or tuck behind a back and under bottom. Hopefully, you are already using a tempur-pedic or foam mattress on the bed. I also like puppy pads to absorb liquids - us the cheapest ones that do not have scents added.

LORD Jesus - Thank you that this dear one is being well-cared for by family. Help her to be comfortable. Help those who are caring for her to find methods and medications to reduce pain. Bring her to your side in a manner that brings peace for all. AMEN

Maybe ask about a med that can be given precare, for example before a bed bath or repositioning. There are meds that will enter her system quickly but also not stay in her system for very long after. I hope you find a way to keep her comfortable.

Often if you can medicate about 30 minutes before you have to reposition her or do any other tasks that might be painful for her that might help.
Also before you pick up her arm or do anything else tell her what you are going to be doing. And if possible maybe gently rub the area or warm it to get some blood circulation going and warm the muscles before you move her. Also the "hands on" will give a gentle indication that movement will come soon.

prayers to you and your family

I am sending prayers to you both. I wish I knew the answer. I myself am in horrible constant pain when I have to move and can't stand more than 30 seconds. There is nothing that can be done - I just tolerate it and often cry. I don't know what else to say.

Prayers!
My mom has severe arthritis in her knees and hips. We rub over-the-counter pain reliever cream with lidocaine on her sore joints before we move her. It seems to help some.

Imho, give the pain medication about 45 minutes before you must reposition your mother in law so that the medication can take effect. Prayers sent.

Prayers sent for you and your family.

My motherinlaw passed away peacefully this morning. I am grateful for her long life, that she is no longer in pain and that she is finally at rest. I guess St. Patrick is her new patron saint since she went to be with God on St. Patrick’s day! Thanks to all of you for the support on the site. It has been so very helpful.

MaryBee,

I am so sorry for the loss of your mother in law.

I was very close to my mother in law. She died many years ago in February so I guess her patron will be St. Valentine. It’s appropriate, because her heart was filled with love.

St. Patrick was remarkable. I suppose that I am a bit biased, I am Irish ☘️. So I believe that your mother in law will be in good hands.

MaryBee, my thoughts and prayers are with you during this difficult time. Your MIL was fortunate to have such a caring DIL. I am glad she passed peacefully. May she rest in peace.

MaryBee: I am so sorry to read of your mother in law's passing. Please accept my deepest condolences.

I’m sorry for your loss. Knowing she’s out of pain is a great comfort. I wish your family peace and rest

God bless you during this time of grief. May God send his angels to wrap their wings around you and give you comfort. Prayers sent up for you!🙏

I happened on your post and wanted to extend my condolences. I'm sure you have much sadness but take a little comfort knowing that she is free of pain. Take care.

Praying for your family. Get some rest now and know she is in the hands of the almighty never to be stricken with any illness again. RIP TO YOUR MIL 🙏🏻🙏🏻