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My mother was palliative in Mississauga. I bring her home, she only move the head, she was funny and concentrated, happy, she was my life. But to see suffer is terrible. I call for help, they came and say she was in the process, call the family. I did not know how to take care of her. The nurses came every day, did not say anything, plus they did not use the palliative case kit, it has all the meds. I told them, they respond not yet. Past 10 horrendous days, she has fever, 38.9. I call them so many times for help, she was in pain. There is a law to have any answer why they did that, why they make her to suffer so much, Please tell me what can I do? They told me the system did not work. That is correct to make a senior pararalize,screaming, black foot, crying, she was seeing pain pain pain, and the nurses did not help? I am desperate. Thank you so much.

Perhaps you can find help here: ACE The Advocacy Centre for the Elderly

http://www.advocacycentreelderly.org/index.php
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Beri your pain is clear from your post. I understand that you need answers to why the nurses did not use the pain relief medications to make your mother comfortable in her last days.

First you need to be in contact with your local health authority, probably the Peel Health Department and raise your concerns with them. They can let you know if they can launch an investigation or if you have to go through the Provincial Ministry of Health. It will take time to investigate. If you belong to a faith community, reach out to them for support.

Write down all the details now while it is fresh in your head. I am not sure if your spelling and grammar is related to the stress you are in or if perhaps English is not your first language. It would help to have some one help you write your concerns clearly and concisely.

If the box of medications are still there, keep it. Tape it shut, sign the date you taped it up, have someone witness your signature on the tape. that way you can prove that none of the pain medication was used.

It is highly unlikely you would get any sort of a financial settlement. Your Mum was close to death. But those who withheld important pain control from a dying woman do need to be held accountable.

I am so sorry you had to witness your Mum dying in such a terrible way. Palliative Care is supposed to ease the pain.
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Beri, try going to this link

http://www.mississauga.ca/portal/residents/olderadults-servicessupport

and see if any of the contact details there are helpful to you.

There are formal complaints procedures you will be able to follow; but first of all you need to speak to an official adviser, so that you can be sure of sending your complaint to the right people.

Good luck, and please let us know how you get on.
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One thing I envy the Americans is the availability of at home hospice, although it is far from perfect. How did you come to the decision to choose at home palliative care? Too often we in Ontario expect to be taken care of and don't understand how to maximize the services offered, unfortunately the onus lies with you to search for the appropriate care resources, even if it means paying out of pocket. I'm so sorry, no one should have to die in pain and no caregiver should have to witness it.
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