Morbid obesity. 400+ pounds.

I have never seen a morbidly obese person - and there are multiple in my family - that did not have a world of hurt in their background. Some turn to food to help with that hurt. Some turn to anger. Hope you can find some comfort and peace.

Suba,
I couldn't figure out what morbidly obese person was currently bothering you, so thought perhaps you were caregiving one, but exploration of your profile shows your caregiving days with family and as a CNA are over.

I wondered if maybe you got squished in an airline seat or something, so decided to check recent posts, but that "following" thingy appears locked out.

So, I can't learn much about you. It could just be that your time as a CNA left you with what I call my "bad nurse's back" (either I am a bad nurse or have a bad back; take your pick).

If you are bothered in general by obesity it is, for this Forum, an odd thing to post. I mean some actually come here to start fights. Anything will do: "pit bulls" or "masks" or "Hospice" are always good for argument.

I HAVE been curious lately, given I am here more often myself of late because we old-timers on Forum lately want to check in on a regular we all love, to see how she is faring dealing with recent medical issues. I don't much like "discussions" in general. Your answer may help me understand the allure.

Why this subject? To what avail? Do you want to let the overweight know that there are people judging them? Do you think they might not know that? Do you think you will have them close the bag of Trader Joe Old Fashioned Potato chips (Lordy those are good) and thereby help them on a journey to vibrant good health? Are you here for their own good? Are you mad? Just why? It's a personal question. But so is weight (152.6 stone cold naked with a bag of potato chips in my hand).

I am hoping to see you up on the high road. You're a CNA. You can do a world of good up there. I hope I will see your name on at least 5 posts before sundown!

@Suba

Since you're not actually a caregiver to anyone suffering from super morbid obesity and don't have to deal with any of the issues stemming from that health condition I would suggest you mind your own f-----g business.
Is anyone asking you to pull out your checkbook and pay for all those broken chairs and car seats that the super obese people break?
No, I didn't think so.
Is anyone asking you to personally "accommodate yet another in mental illness"?
Once again. Nope.
So really maybe you'd do well to just shut the hell up.
Have a nice day.

Suba5723, let's not forget, eating habits usually are developed when one is a child. How many times have we heard from Mom to "clean your plate or you get no dessert." Or the Mom who finishes left over food on their child's plate so it won't go to waste?

People who can't afford to get more healthier choices because they need to try to stretch that dollar, thus will buy high carb foods, such as potatoes, noodles, and rice.

And sometimes heavy weight is a gene past on from generation to generation, long before fast food even existed.

Meanwhile, a doctor quit his practice trying to help obese patients lose weight and opened The Heart Attack Grill where the highest fat and calorie foods on earth are served because thats what some people WANT. Nurse-waitresses attend to the patrons who don't want "low calorie" food so they frequent the cafe to indulge.

https://vegasfoodandfun.com/heart-attack-grill/

Who are you to say what others should or shouldn't eat while you yourself visit DQ???? And how are YOU accommodating these overeaters with "body odor, mental denial, cost of broken chairs" and yada yada when you care for nobody? "Compassion" is a word you should remove from your profile!


Judgemental much? I sure hope YOU'RE perfect 😑

For those that want lower cal and less expensive options at the drive thru, ever hear of a Happy Meal ?

You should save your rant for Reddit and spare those of us going thru REAL crises right now. This post should be deleted imo.

Oh my gosh, I just read your profile. You’re speaking about eating healthy and in your profile you say that you go to Dairy Queen! LOL 😆 That is funny!

You are a retired CNA and your parents are dead and don’t care for anyone. You say that you are a tech idiot? I agree with you on the idiot part!

Why are you posting on the AgingCare website? For fun? To talk about overweight people? For what purpose?

What low cal foods do you order at DQ? How much do you weigh? 400? 500?

Sorry, no not sorry for the sarcasm.

JoAnn29, it's my understanding that the OP is not a caregiver at all and just stumbled on this forum a few weeks back.
She has posted several things that have not been "caregiver" related, and this is just one more.
And I have to say that I take great offense to what she's written as a lot of people do suffer from obesity, but they are still human beings, with feelings just like the rest of us, and to talk about them in such a vulgar and disgusting way I find quite disturbing. Yes it often can be a "mental" issue, but unless you've walked in someone else's shoes, you have no right to comment or judge.

That's just my 2 cents worth and no I am not obese. Just a person who believes that we should treat everyone with the respect they deserve.

Who are you caring for and why?

I believe that food is addictive. I think overeating is caused by many things. Depression, anxiety, no self-esteem. For me, its years of counting calories and not eating more than I burn off. Skinny, no but I am not overweight either for my age. I was a chubby child and refuse to allow myself to go back there. But thats my mindset. I have been doing this so long, that I fill up very fast. I eat small meals and my DH and I split meals when we go out. He is 76 and weighs the same as he did when we married 42 yrs ago.

Food is immediate gratification. Once you weigh 400lbs, its a lot of work to get it off. It can be done. They now take part of the stomach do you fill up easier. Its not a cure though, its a tool. And you want to have to want to lose that weight. They have to move. Even a little bit will burn calories. Start by just cutting back, the weight will start to come off. When they hit a plateau, cut back more and up the exercise.

Me I would not care for someone like this.

I own bars that have limited food service. I have offered smaller portions at a lower cost. They did not do well. I’ve offered healthier options. Also not accepted. Obese people many times go for the least healthy largest portions. You can’t make anyone eat healthier or eat less it’s an individual choice.

Suba - you wrote - "I find I get mad since I feel that I must accommodate yet another..."

I think that's why you are mad - at least partly. Not so much about what food is available. We all make our choices - hour by hour, day by day.

Take a look at FOG - fear, obligation and guilt.

I see a lot of obligation here which if not met is followed by fear and guilt.

Do you really have to accommodate yet another...?

This person is making unhealthy choices. That does not mean you have to make unhealthy choices too and try to care for this person at your own expense.

Some of us are "fixers", "rescuers" often b/c that role was thrust on us as children. As adults we can make healthier choices. Is it time for you to say "No" to caring for this person who doesn't care for themselves? You can only change you, you can't change anyone else. Do something good for you today!!!

You don’t have to accommodate anything you don’t wish to accommodate. It’s called boundaries. And there are plenty of options for eating less available to all. In fast food I very often eat kids meals. And hubby and I often split meals in restaurants or when I order a meal I also ask for a to-go box and place half my meal in it for later. Americans as a rule eat far too much, it’s not mental illness, it’s habit, but we each have the power of self control, just have to use it, or not

The healthier mini drive through meal would be the kids options, but I doubt anyone who is used to eating the kind of portions that got them up to 400 lbs would be satisfied with that.

Well, this is a 'problem' that will never be 'fixed' because people have the right to eat themselves to death.

Very few obese people don't 'know' what's causing them to be heavy. My cousin never weighed under 350 lbs after the age of 18. She insisted it was water weight. Smart, educated woman and that's what she thought.

Trust me, overweight people KNOW what they need to do. Your anger is misplaced. A little compassion goes a long way.

BTW--FF places DO sell smaller meals. They're called 'Kiddy meals'.