My Mom has some rather "with it" professional friends who think they "get her" better than we (her family) does..which can
cause some alarming side effects. For example, some of my my Mom's friends have been encouraging her to apply for subsidized housing in independent living when what she needs is skilled nursing care. She needs constant iv antibiotiotics, assitance with mobility and toilleting, and has emergency access issues, and yet, her "friends" are encouraging her to apply for an independent living arrangement for which she would not be qualified,nor which would be safe nor optimal for her medical conditions. I would like to caution these optimistic "friends" to think twice before offering encouragement to choose inappropriate living arrangements out of "kindness" or nostalgia and give a little thought to practicality and safety before offering an opinion!! I know it's tough for friends to offer a tough love approach, sometimes, but it is really so counter-productive for friends to offer false support to elders in their desire to "live beyond their capabilities" as independent adults when their needs dictate otherwise. PLEAE BE AWARE THAT THE ENCOURAGEMENT YOU OFFER ELDERS MUST BE GOOD ADVICE!!

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or Please be aware ... it's great to offer encouragement, don't get me wrong..but it is so easy to commiserate with some poor soul who is so missing their past independence and offer false hope for a llife they can't have seems it sets the caregiver back so many steps to getting them to the care they need at the moment..pardon the frustration!!

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