My 77 year old mom lives in a city 2 hours away. I found out through her IHSS caregiver that she is borrowing from check cashing places and not paying them back, moving from one check cashing place to the next. I've been getting calls from these places for over 6 months because she uses my name as a reference.
In addition, when I visited a couple weeks ago I went through her papers while she was asleep. I found that she has been behind on her rent for 6 months (she lives in a government subsidized senior housing apartment complex) and had a shutoff notice from the utility company because she was behind in payments.. IN addition, her phone was turned off for almost a month because she couldn't pay the bill. Her bank statement shows 5 or 6 returned checks over the past month with accompanying fees.
Meantime she has been buying clothing and jewelery, but sometimes doesn't have enough money for food. She's very low income and can't afford to be mismanaging what money she does have let alone spending extravagantly on "extras".
I've tried talking to her about her money problems but she gets angry and says it's "under control" and that it's none of my business. Meanwhile she calls me,my brother and my aunt asking to borrow money.
She does not have officially diagnosed dementia or alzheimer's but I"ve noticed her short term memory is deteriorating. I'm not sure what to do about this. I see her getting into a debt spiral that is impossible to get out of, not to mention the threat of shut-off utilities and no food. Any experience around this would be appreciated.