I am doing the thing I swore up and down I'd never do, providing 24/7 care at home. She has had this undiagnosed blood cancer for the last six months or so, and then this weekend she developed a UTI and rapidly progressed to sepsis. She was taken to the ER (despite being enrolled in hospice) for IV fluids and IV antibiotics. After one day she refused further treatment, insisting on going home. The hospital would not keep her if she refused the IV treatment (since any other treatment can be given at home) so they sent her home in an ambulance, unable to walk, sit up on her own, get to the potty, or anything. She's been sleeping the better part of the last 4 days, with occasional requests for water or bedpan.
I'm the one who elected to come home with her. Somebody had to do it, and I couldn't see sitting on my hands somewhere else while my mother is actively dying. She knows I'm here, she knows it's me taking care of her, and she's peaceful and pain-free for the most part. Today I learned how to change sheets with the patient still in the bed, a patient who is 180 lbs of pretty much dead weight. I'm not complaining. I got clean dry sheets under her and she was able to sleep more comfortably then. That's all I'm here for, to make her last few days as comfortable as possible. Still haven't figured out when I can safely go to sleep though. Please wish me well and my mother a peaceful passing, thank you all.