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My siblings and I decided to ask Moms doctor to help us bring Mom in to have her driving abilities tested. It needed to be done, there were dings appearing on her car and her driving was getting bad. We wanted her off the road before something awful happened. She did not pass and they took her licence. I thought I would feel relief and in one way I did but I also felt terribly sad. It hit me that Moms life as she knew it is over. She took it pretty well but I could hear the sadness and defeat in her voice. That just broke my heart.

Mom is not an easy person and she can be downright mean. I have had to learn to keep a healthy space between us or I end up being engulfed in her anger and misery but that does not mean I don't love her or feel for her. Boy this stuff is hard.

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Already on it freqflyer :) We had a case worker come in two weeks ago and she set them up with a 2X weekly home aide who can do shopping plus the are entitled to 4 free, to and from cab rides for medical visits. A couple years ago I signed Mom up for elder transport services but she wouldn't use it, not convenient enough for her, I'm hoping she will reconsider now. Between the three of us siblings Mom n Dad never go more than a few days without one of us visiting. We can make a point of taking her out on those days.
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One thing we need to remember that when we take something away from an elder, we need to replace it with something else.

Your Mom can't drive any more, thus something needs to be put into place to help your Mom still feel somewhat independent. Any cab companies in your area that deal with driving the elderly? Any elderly transportation by the country? I realize mainly larger metro area have these types of things. Or would she be like my parents who refuse to ride with strangers :P

Maybe you or any siblings living in the area can set aside a couple of hours one afternoon to drive Mom where ever she wants to go.
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thanks looloo. I just got off the phone with Mom and the reality is sinking in. I think she was in denial yesterday. Today she is not doing very well with it. Who would? Certainly not me, I would hate it. She is going to need time to adjust.
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Hugs and kudos to you and your sibs, Tryingmybest. This is really hard, and really sad. So glad your mother managed to handle it well.
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