She is normally an overachiever I live 6 hours away I left my family and job duties she will not go to rehab is basically espectically me to take her 2 to 3 times to rehab. I'm so angry w her. Leaving the hospital she could have went right to rehab and been 2 weeks better but we are here at her home no better. Her doc says she's doing good staples out this week wants her to start rehab Monday. I have a life and I'm breadwinner for my family. I'm so mad at her. Anyone w me???

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I wouldn't be angry with her. If she overestimated the time commitment that you could give, then I would get that straight and make arrangements for her care. Leaving after surgery for recovery is a big decision. If you mom can't appreciate the care she will need, then someone will have to step in and help get it done. anyway. Didn't the hospital social worker inquire about who would be available and their time commitment? I would think they would get confirmation.

How was the decision for your mother not to go to rehab reached? Was that her choice? Is she mentally competent to make those kinds of decisions? Did anesthesia from the surgery bring on or reveal dome underlying cognitive issues?

There are lots of questions you need to ask her doctors, your mom and yourself. When you left your family and your job, what was YOUR understanding of what you were being asked to do?

Your mother is going to have to hire in home help. You need to return to your family and job.

Discuss this situation with her doctor; s^/he needs to understand that you are not a permanent fixture. Your mother may be saying "oh, my daughter can take care of that"

. Do you have POA? Do you have an understanding of her finances? Can she afford help?

Don't be angry with her. Just understand that as an adult, when your parent says "you must" or " I need you to" or even "please can you", you have a right to say no and you have a right to " yes, I can come for a week".

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