now that my dad has had a severe stroke(5 months ago) and will not be returning home. I am the only child that lives near my mother and have seen some issues that make me concerned for her safety. Although my siblings agree, they do not want to make her angry and want me to manipulate her into doing what needs to be done. I am not good at manipulating and feel that it is insulting to my mother's dignity. She lives alone and drives to places that have too much traffic. She keeps food too long and does not take medication as she should. She has some excellent days but has many difficult days regarding her ability to make safe decisions. I love and respect both of my parents, but I also know that sometimes others need to step up and help.I am tired due to trying to visit my father on a regular basis, my job, and my own family's needs, so I may not be seeing the situation clearly and would appreciate the advice of others. Sadly,talking about issues is not an option in my family.

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Find Care & Housing
You family is, sadly, all too common when it comes to not talking about issues. I'd strongly suggest that your mom be checked for fluid buildup in her brain. That can cause dementia symptoms. This happened with my dad, who had a closed head injury during WWII. If she does have this, they may want to put in a shunt to drain the fluid. My dad had that done and the results were disastrous, but atypical. Generally this operation is successful. There are always risks so you'll want to discuss it thoroughly.

Hopefully, she will agree to get checked out., If she thinks that there may be help for her issues, she may be more willing.

I'm so sorry you have to be the one to do all this alone. You have to be exhausted. The peanut gallery with all of their advice isn't helping.
Good luck to you,

Subscribe to
Our Newsletter