Merry Christmas!

We did Christmas different this year. My husband was on standby - but let's just say that since I receive no help from my siblings on trying to get them to do anything for anybody but themselves - I decided that they could handle - or not - Christmas on their own with Momma. Now we did go over to visit with her a couple of days the week before Christmas and took her shopping and out to dinner and such - but since we have lost dad 3 1/2 years ago and if it was not us it would have been dad to make Christmas actually happen - we had Christmas at home. We are the ones that drive four hours - husband works full time - go buy the groceries and cook it. Of course we are the ones to clean up and nobody thinks twice about it. Both of my siblings are drug addicts and sis is mental. They take advantage of momma and she does not realize it. I am the trustee of hrr estate snd they can't stand it. he last time I was over there - I got cursed out by sis and bro and then my momma takes up for bro and tells me that it was me. Later in another conversation from momma - she then takes up for sis. Yes - momma is having problems with reasoning and memory problems. She changes from one conversation to the next. Since the last situation I have decided that I am not going to be treated like this. My husband and I have made sacrifices in our lives so I can take care of momm and her finances because she is not able too but I have been pulling back a little. Yes - I am going to still take care of my momma the best I know too. Do I make mistakes? Yes - but you know what she did not come with a instruction manual.

my aunt is being treated well at nh too . they are keeping her in optimum physical health and the staff and other inmates love her . shes getting so comfortable that she doesnt care if family visits or not . that doesnt hurt my feelings a bit . her well being is whats important . i only visit every 2 - 3 days now .

Glad to hear CM!

I am grateful that the nurses and nursing assistants taking care of my mother in hospital are being so kind to her. It's bad enough her having to be in hospital instead of at home for Christmas. I don't know how I would cope if the ward staff were too busy to care.

its taken 16 months since moms death for me to begin caring for myself again . what got me in a better frame of mind was reconnecting with old hobbies . who would think that a rattling steam valve on a pressure canner or shaping and pruning fruit trees could be so therapeutic ?

Captain...Sounds like you are doing great! Good health to you. Thanks for the reminder that life on the other side of this will be a good life.

im thankful to the va for eradicating hepc for me this year . its been a constant source of worry for 16 years . im thankful that work is looking good into the next year and thankful theres plenty of firewood and food in reserve for the winter . im thankful to have survived end stage dementia care with my mother . in hindsight i can imagine the stress from such an endeavor killing a person . good luck to everyone here still mired down in elder care . youll get your life back even tho you cant see it right now .

I am grateful for the support and love I have and that mom had no medical crisis this year to deal with.

Merry Christmas and blessings to all doing their best in a difficult role.