Mother refuse to go home peacefully. She says call the cops. I have my deceased sibling's kids. She helps and hinders with them. I'm past ready for her to go.
She knows I won't call the cops as I hate drama. Any answers?

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Dear Godschild,

I'm so sorry to hear of this difficult family situation. Are you able to talk to a social worker? Maybe there some community programs that will help. I know its hard to be firm against your own mother, but sometimes that is the best course of action.

I don't want to excuse her behaviour. But I wonder if maybe she has medical reason or is she secretly lonely or scared about going back to her home. Hopefully the social worker can be of assistance.

Thinking of you.

Oh dear, I've got far more questions than answers... You may not feel in the mood for these, but it's hard to know what to suggest without understanding the situation better.

How long ago did your sibling die? Where is the children's other parent? How old are the children?
How long ago did your mother move into the house, and how did this come about?
The "excuses" she makes for not returning to her own home: do they have any basis in reality, are there issues that could be addressed in among them?
Are you on your own, or do you have your own spouse and your own children to consider?
How old is your mother?
Are you living in the US or in a different country?

You need to call the cops, it is your home and she is destroying the respect that the children have for you and others. If she throws a fit when 911 responds, all the better, they can see for themselves why she needs to go. I would also ask for a psych evaluation if she throws a fit.

You need to do damage control quickly so the children can learn that there are behaviours that are completely unacceptable and should not be tolerated. It is hard enough raising children, impossible if they have no respect and that is the end result of these environments.

It will be hard to handle your mom this way but it is ALL about the kids at this stage. She sounds like a selfish piece of work to be doing this with children that have already lost so very much.

Says she is here for kids but finally admitted that it's for herself to cut back on her bills. I do not accept bill money as she already tries to boss my house. Saying its what she let her mom do with her. I told her I am not her and she is not her mother. She has called me names in front of the kids and mine. She kids mad when I tell her she is not telling the truth. If things aren't going her way either she is a victim or it is a sin. She is a senior who has her own place but make excuses for going home. She says she doesn't want to go to nursing home. Other siblings didn't want to live with her again.

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