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Wondering how we settle our minds when a good person, giving, gracious, kind and hard-working all her life gets a horrible disease like AD? So many people say she doesn't deserve it and it's a long horrible road to be on. What do you say to those people? I know in my mind that illness and disease aren't handed out like punishment from the universe to only the "bad" people among us, but still... sigh.

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I don't think that I do make peace when I hear of tragedies, like people getting dementia, cancer or some other horrible condition. It's horrific and unacceptable. I pray for acceptance. My mind is not capable of understanding how or why it happens.
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"Fair" is a concept of how people should treat people. It does not apply to the universe. Life is not fair.
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This hits home--our wonderful dentist recently retired after 40 years in practice--keeps his license up to date so he can pop in the office and "play"--this man and his wife worked for so many years to build the practice and make it a terrific business, but better yet, a great dental practice. Now they had a chance to travel and enjoy grandkids---

I just found out his sweet wife has Alzheimer's. I couldn't feel worse about it. All those years of hard work and sacrifice--and this happens.

As my hubby often says "It rains on the just and unjust alike". Still stinks, but he's right.
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Have you read "When Bad Things Happen to Good People"?

Great book by a rabbi whose son suffered from a truly awful disease. He makes some sort of sense of it all.

What to say to people? "Medical research is very important, we should support efforts to find causes and cures". "It's SO important that there are programs to support caregivers and patients; support candidates who get that". "It's a wonderful thing to volunteer to drive for Meals for Wheels, Friendly Visitors, in Senior Centers, have you thought about doing that?"
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