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PeggySue....I can tell you there are mixed feelings here and we weren't "hoping" this person died FGS. S/He was an organ donor officially brain dead with a small window of time in which the liver could be harvested. S/He is going to die anyway, whether or not the Mayo team is there to harvest the organs or not. Dh and I are organ donors ourselves and will be in this position too one day, along with our kids. It's the way the cycle works.

I am not going to feel guilty for being an organ recipient....not at all. That is not the purpose of being here and going thru this process. And, the recipients have to prep and fast and be tested and ready to go if the transplant is a go, and they have to accept the organ, so sometimes we can't be told at the last minute. And, life support cannot be used AFTER a person dies, either, bc their organs begin to die as soon as they do. That's why there's a 30 minute window to harvest organs.

In a perfect world, we wouldn't be in need of a new liver and this patient wouldn't have died of a cardiac issue. And sometimes organ recipients wind up dying waiting for a donor, so thats so sad for THEIR family. So much for perfect world scenarios, huh?

Colleen, thanks for keeping everyone updated here, I appreciate it.
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Lea, he couldn’t have been brain dead if he was breathing 30 minutes after life support had ended, given that breathing is controlled by the brain.

Telling the recipient family anytime earlier than when the organ harvesting process was 100 percent sure to go forward just seems…kinda cruel to everyone.

The prioritized recipients should be donors, preferably longtime ones. There are only about 10k donors available for 110k people, and if you didn’t sign up to do this when your organs could actually help others, you can be the 9 out of 10 not considered now.
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I'm praying, Lealonnie!
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I had no idea about how the organ donation and recipient process worked. It is fascinating. Hoping DH gets his transplant soon.
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Hugs to you both.

It's an awful process, isn't it? Hope you have lots of tips and wrinkles to help keep your minds off the waiting. What happens now?
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I always say that the "waiting room" is the worst room in the house. I am sorry this didn't work out this time, both for you and hubby, and for the person who so wishes that her/his organs would go on to give new life. You know the chances of this and how this works, so it is more waiting. Thanks for keeping us abreast of everything, Lea.
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PeggySue.....please STOP commenting on this thread. Thank you.

CM....we wait. Yesterday was a dry run. Another donor will come along and we will try again.

Thank you weary, sp, alva....for your support. Today is a better day and we are relaxing and moving forward.
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Lea, the only disagreement I’ve had with you is to point out that factually the donor couldn’t have been brain dead and still breathing independently for any amount of time.

I assume we share the same interest in making more organs available. If it gets out that respected institutions are actually telling recipients that there’s a donor available before he has died officially, that could make more donors or donor families less apt to follow through. All the recipient needs to know is that there might be a liver available and not the backstory while the donor is technically alive and with their own Medical privacy intact. And that’s the only way you can get even the paltry 10k supply of donors and their families to make the commitment.
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Folks, I think we need to acknowledge the strain that Lea and Chuck must be under right now and leave anything other than support for them at the doorstep.

I'm sure yesterday gave you both an opportunity to get used to the strong emotions that go along with this harrowing process. Via con Dios ♥️ ❤️ 💙 💕
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I agree 100% with what BarbBrooklyn said below, that we all must be nothing but supportive to Lealonnie and her husband Chuck, because unless any of us have walked in their shoes, we have no idea how stressful and trying this time must be for them. So it really serves no purpose to try and argue a point with her just because you can.
Instead let's ALL be respectful of them and only send them words of encouragement and your prayers. They really need both right now.
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Lea, checking in tonight to see how the two of you are doing after the roller coaster yesterday. It must be so very hard to wait . . . and not know how long you will wait. I hope you are able to find things to do each day.
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Thanks to everyone who has showed their love and support for our friend and her husband! 😇
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4.29.22

4:15 PM: DH got a call at 4 PM to come to the Mayo hospital immediately; there is another liver for him from another DCD donor who's here. We are on our way and totally unprepared for this. Surgery will be at 6 pm local time IF this liver is viable; this MAY be another dry run though, who knows?
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Praying for all parties... that everything goes smoothly if this is the liver meant for DH and continued peace that transcends understanding ((and some hugging!))
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((((((hugs))))) and prayers
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This is certainly an amazing learning process for many of us as it is the future life experience for you two. I know you have the strength LeaL and I keep you in my prayers for the recovery.
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OMG! This is such a rollercoaster. My heart skipped a beat reading about the call from the hospital possibly having another donor.

Praying this is it...
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DH was wheeled into the OR around 7:30 pm tonight. The liver was clean and viable, thank God. He was scared to death and so am I. The speech the anesthesiologist made was the most horrible thing I've heard in my life and had me in tears, expecting the worst outcome, frankly. The hugeness of this surgery is mind boggling when it's explained, medically. I am an emotional mess, my DD is in New Orleans with her fiance now and crying her eyes out she's not here with me for support, and that I'm alone. The neighbor Winnie has been great though, and I am grateful for her support.

The surgery can take anywhere from 6-15 hours; Chuck has a pacemaker and has had triple bypass which complicates things, so they have to take extra precautions which can extend the time. I'll be texted every 2 hours and then the surgeon will phone me when it's over. Probably sometime in the middle of the night. I'm back at the hotel (5 minutes away) with the dog and we're hunkering down (at the suggestion of the Mayo staff). They also suggested I wait here until he's extubated and free of the wires and hook-ups that will have me upset to see. I can call the ICU in the morning to get an update on his condition, and if he's been extubated yet, etc.

God give me strength; I'm not sure I realized how hard this would be, being in another state, away from home and friends/family, etc.

Thanks for your support everyone, I appreciate it.
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Lealonnie,
Support is here. 👩👨👩‍🦳️👵👱‍♂️🧓👱‍♀️👩‍🦰️
Prayers for you, as it is difficult to be waiting, standing by. Prayers for your trust in god's plan.
There is no guilt if you need to doze off in-between the updates by the doctor.
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Lea, I'm awake in the middle of the night here--hope you are fast asleep and that the surgeons' hand are guided from above.

I haven’t waited through a transplant, only a 6 hour aorta repair. I can only imagine your angst right now. We're all here for you, honey. ((((((Hugs))))))) to you and Chuck.
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Standing by at midnight with continued prayers for your comfort.
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April 30

2:00 am: Surgery is over and Chuck did well! Will wait till 8am to call the ICU to check his status before heading over, as suggested by the surgeon. They have to watch for bleeding now from the new liver which is a potential problem. Next 12-24 hours are crucial. 

I'll keep you updated
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I’m choked up, with the awe and wonder of this all!

It’s happened so fast!

Praying for you guys!!
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Thank you so much! (((((Hugs)))) and prayers all around 🙏 ❤️ 💖
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: )
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Yay! Over Hump #1! So looking forward to the next updates...! May you receive mercy and peace (((hugging)))
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Prayers that Chuck will sail through the post surgical period so that they can return to their home in Denver. Even the Marriott in Scottsdale gets old when you wanna go home.
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Our thoughts are with you Lea. Looking forward to updates. This will be the hard part for you, I think.
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May The Lord continue to keep his hands on Chuck and his medical team, may HE grant you strength, peace and comfort during this very trying, exciting time.

ps: The speech is a cya. They have to give worse case scenario just to make sure expectations are kept real. I hate that part of any surgery.
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Just spoke with Chuck on the phone who is VERY groggy but very ALIVE and asking for a sandwich after being extubated at 7 am this morning!! He received A LOT of blood during the procedure; he was listed as 'emergent' with a MELD score of just under 40 due to the liver cancer being the type that metastasizes quickly. This is why he was top priority to get a liver.

Feeling very relieved right now and grateful to the donor, his/her family, and everyone who's been so supportive here. THANK YOU.

I'm on my way over to the Mayo hospital now.

I'll keep you all updated. We have a long road ahead of us, with potential complications and lots of ups & downs/ medications/doctors appointments and at least 4-6 weeks minimum here in North Scottsdale (without complications), so in many ways, the journey has just begun.
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