It's been a year!
It's been a year, today, since my mom died.
The time has gone by so quickly--and so slowly.
As I thought, and stated, my family fractured pretty quickly after mom's estate was settled. It was small and I gave mine to YB who cared for mom for so many years. That made me feel like I'd done the right thing. My family is not on bad terms, it's just the one person who held us together is now gone and we just don't make the effort to get together. I'm a little sad about that, but I'm not surprised.
I still thank God every single day that He took mom home before she got actively sick and needed more care. Such a blessing.
Then having MIL fall apart just a few months later--she is slowing killing my DH with her incessant whining, bad attitude and demands. That situation remains stagnant. I cannot say 'stable', just stagnant. He is now profoundly depressed with no end to this mess in sight.
This situation with MIL has made me doubly glad that we didn't have to go this route with Mom.
Death doesn't scare me. The thought of living like my MIL scares me enough.
Oh, and it's our 47th anniversary. True to form, DH forgot. I just gave him his gift and he said "You deserve such a better husband." To which I replied "I most assuredly do".
11 Comments
Popular Questions
Related Questions
- Mom tanks in afternoon. Has anyone experienced this?
- It's 2am. I'm sitting here studying and the waterworks came pouring out. Gosh, I miss my Mum. When will this get easier?
- Anyone else experiences isolation and postponed grief after death of narcissistic mother?
- Family plot burial causing fights. Can they have the box my mom’s ashes are in and removed?
I made some pretty good friends who have my back.
I've watched the burden and don't want to be one. Out of the 3 siblings left, I do dread that call.....I had a moment of nostalgia and sent one sister a card offering to meet up...before we can't. It was ignored. Feels weird when I'm asked who my "Emergency Contact" is and I don't have one.
My estate will be distributed by a Trust to a handful of good people who have no idea it is coming. Kinda like the old TV show "Millionaire" when the stranger shows up with a big check.
I've been thinking about this a lot lately. A couple weeks ago when I had to go to the ER for a kidney infection I never even thought to tell anyone in my family. I'm sure they have all gone through their own dramas as well and didn't tell me. What scares me is getting that call one day that one of us has died.
I could reach out but I wouldn't know what to say. All the old hurts stand between us all. But I do wish them well.
Sorry your DH forgot your anniversary. Do something special for yourself.
I stand by my feelings that family doesn’t always have to be the people that we are biologically related to.
A couple of my closest friends are like the sisters that I never had.
Ironic how your brother taking care of your mother for 20 years kind of mimics what your DH is doing with his mother.
What ever happened to that bird, did brother get someone to take it and give it a decent life or is it still in that apartment?
😡😡😡😡😡
(((Hug)))
I hope soon your stress diminishes, things go better generally and he shows much more affection.
He should do something for you to make up for having forgotten.
Triple (((Hug))) from me, VentingisSNACK.