You need a power of attorney for health care, a power of attorney for financial affairs, a will, a statement for disposition of remains (and hopefully you have PREPAID for a cremation or whatever you want), Directive to health Care Facilities (they now call this a POLS...used to be called DNR). Of course you need a joint checking account and plans for your own living afterward. All of this may be available free through a local senior center where attorneys donate their time.

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When dad passed in 2015 he had things set up, and it went very smoothly for me. Mom just passed last week,, same story with the exception of one IRA and we are getting that dealt with. So my plan for Feb is to get hubs and my will updated, and a POA done. He is dragging his heals.. I have no idea why because his dads will and wishes are a bit of mess, and they were recently done! At least I am an only child and so is our daughter,, so that makes it a bit easier! I am ready to go with out him,, and just drag him in for the signing!! (if thats even legal.. LOL)

So true. It took years to convince my parents to set up POAs and update their wills. When I told them if they didn’t the state would take over and appoint guardians they finally got them done. I also told them they could appoint anyone they trusted as POA as long as they picked someone. They were afraid doing so would allow us to force them into a nursing home. It took the lawyer to explain exactly what powers the POA has.

With the pandemic raging I decided to review my own will and other papers. Good thing since several of my heirs have died!

LightandHarmony, getting old can be EXPENSIVE, and most of us don't think about it until our parents are dealing with it in the present.

I had zero idea at the cost of caregivers, until later when my Dad needed around the clock care due to being a major fall risk. My gosh, it was costing him $20k per month. And later with my Mom living in a nursing home due to final stage dementia which was triggered by a head injury fall, which was costing Dad $12k per month.

Thank goodness my parents had "rainy day" funds. I was a senior myself and no way I could be hands-on. Thankfully my parents had taught me since I was 5 years old to save $$$.

I was just blown away at those cost figures. Before that I notice their Wills and POA were older than dirt. My folks [they were in their 90's] thought the Wills were ok, but my gosh half the people named in those Will had long passed with provisions for the funds to go to the heirs. Heirs? Some of those people I had no idea who they were, much less who were their heirs :P

Got an appointment for my parents to see an Elder Law Attorney, and was so impressed, that my sig other and myself set up an appointment for our own set of legal documents. Well worth the cost as the Attorney keeps us up-to-date with any Federal or State Law changes that we need to make to our Wills.

Honestly, if the students would pay attention, this should be taught in high school.

My parents divorced decades ago. Mum is now 86 and most her marbles and has everything organized. Dad will be 92 next month and he does have a Will and POA, but that is it.

I am Mum's POA (everything) and will be the Executrix of her Will. My brother is back up. Mum has prepaid for her cremation, has all her paperwork in order and I know where to find things. She is planning to update her Will soon and has chosen to tell me her beneficiaries.

My brother is my Dad's POA and Executor of his Will. I assume DB knows where to find Dad's Will. The POA has been sprung in some matters only. My brother is responsible for preparing Dad's and the Trust income tax returns. They have not been done in 3 years. It will be a mess when Dad dies.

Oh and those income tax returns? All my brother has to do it provide me with the bank statement, bills and I collate everything into a spreadsheet for the accountant. It takes me about 15 hours for each year. I even pay the accountant. But it is far too much effort for my brother to do anything.

Once my divorce was through I made an appointment to update all my documents. I will be reviewing them later this year as I now have a grandchild.

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