Have considered a home for her but have heard nightmares about those places. Not taking them to bathroom when needed but rather putting them in a diaper and changing when they have time and allowing them to get bad bed sores. Not saying this is true, only what I heard especially from someone who witnessed this where she worked. Before my mom got so sick she said she would rather be dead than be in one of those places. Yes, I am tired and miserable and have no real life of my own. So stressed out at times but how could I do this to the woman who was always there for me anytime I needed and would do anything in her power for me??? I know it may be out of my control one day but how can I do such a thing now???

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It seems to me that you would benefit from ongoing support at this time. (((((hugs)))))

Karyll, I was looking back at the question threads you have started and seems like you need ongoing support, not just simply an answer to a specific question. Perhaps you will decide that your mother is best cared for by professionals (that's not a nightmare, that's reality), or maybe you will continue as caregiver, with home nurses coming in, for some time. Why don't you get involved in one of the support threads for family caregivers available on this site...? Here's a link to "YOU" thread. Posting there would be largely the same as posting the individual questions, but it allows for other regulars to follow along with your caregiving journey and give better big-picture support and advice.

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