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She went peacefully and she looked to go. She was here with me and my kids, it was so hard on us but I know she is happy now. I still have a lot of guilt for I don't know what. I do know one thing. I want to write a book on it to let everyone know it will be the hardest thing, there was time I did want to run and to put her in a home, but I knew I had to be here for her. I wake up still to make sure she was ok the last 3 day of her life. I stayed in her room so I was there when she open her eyes and they were so clear. I don't know a lot of things but I do know this Alzheimer's is the worst. But thank you all. I will still be on here, and try to help who ever needs it. Love you all -Terri

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I think I may know the cause of your "guilt"
Relief
exhaustion
Glad that this part of your Journey is over
Glad that this part of your Mom's Journey is over.

If this helps....I was looking at photos of my Husband one day and looking back at them I realized at some point a "light" had left the beautiful blue eyes that I loved so much. I though about it and I recalled the phrase.."Eyes are the windows to the soul" I thought...I wonder if God takes the soul and leaves the shell, this way the person with the Dementia does not realize what is happening (as most don't) this way they are spared the long ordeal. So I like to think my Husband was at peace long before his body gave up.

Sleep well knowing you did all you could do and that is all we can ask of ourselves.
Sleep well knowing that she knew that you loved and cared for her.
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I'm sorry about the loss of your mother. You were certainly a devoted and loving child.. You must take much peace in that. That book sounds amazing. Unless, you encounter dementia first hand, it's difficult to comprehend the way it affects people and their families. No doubt you would have valuable information to offer others. Take care of yourself.
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I am so sorry for your loss.

It seems she went peacefully and with love. What a lovely way to go. You are a lovely person.

Writing your book seems a very good idea.

A chance to relive and share all of your trial and tribulations. A caregivers life is a hard one. With great hardships. BUT, the happy events are spectacular.😊😊 They are the ones that will give you smiles and good memories to help you proceed to the next stage of your life. That is just 'being you'.

I send you love
Buzzy
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