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The doc and I talked to Ron about his guns and he said he would let me lock them up. So while he was sleeping I gathered them all and put them in a combination lock box NOW, when he wakes up it may be a different story. His doc said he did not need guns around because he may mistaken me for a burgler and shoot me. I don't know how this will turn out. Has anyone had this problem and what do I do if he has a fit. Thank you

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Tara. Yes, he's on lots of meds for his physical problems. But now, he's going to need meds what his brain is doing to his mind.

I think you need to call the doctor and discuss this.

Part of caring for a dementia patient is not taking their anger am accusations personally. MUCH easier said than done, and no I am not caring for a dementia patient at home, as you are. You may need to start thinking about whether your husband and you would be safer/happier/more content if he was in memory care.
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Tara, I would get out of there if he is going to become more angry. And do not give hime a gun before you go. If the doc thinks a frontal temporal variety of dementia these people become dangerous to themselves and others because of the angery outbursts that usually go along with it. You will have to be separate at some point in the future. Do what is necessary to protect yourself.
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Separate or divorce? Computer glitch....
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He is gun savvy and not so much out of it that I could give him a "toy"pistol...but thank you..He would just know. Does anyone know what happens when a couple split because the Dementia person wants to
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He has never really been in an angry mood like this. Just little stuff like the TV remote won't work. He is on so many meds for his heart, kidneys, blood pressure, etc. But now he has Dementia going on. He said I was making too much of this Dementia thing that they said it was mild. Well, the CT scan doesn't lie and he failed the memory test and was diagnosed, memory problems and focus could be vascular in nature. His doctor said the word Dementia, not me. Thank you.
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What meds was going to be my question. I would definitely not give in especially since he is angry! I would tell him once he moves out, then maybe. Remind him the doctors insistence to remove them from the house. And leave the house if necessary. Just do not give in! What if you bougt a non operational replica of one that he has? But, I would be afraid if you give in to one he will demand others.
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Tara, do you think you can redirect the conversation? Put on a movie? As for some help in the kitchen?

What meds is he on? Is he on an antidepressant ? I ask because the one gun, one bullet thing sounds vaguely like suicidal ideation to me.

Did you talk to the doctor about his angry moods?
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Ok, my husband just asked me where his gun was and I told him I locked them all up and he said boy you didn't waste any time did you ? He said I have been looking for that fkn gun for two days. I want my guns...I told him he might shoot me and he said then just give him one gun and 1 bullet. Really ??? He said if I didn't give them back to him that was the end of us. We don't have enough money to separate or divorce and he wouldn't last one day without me. I really need a lot of advice ASAP. He has chosen the guns over me and I knew it was coming. We have been married for 48 years and I have known him since I was 13. I am 64 and he is 67. What can I do ? I see the attorney Monday about the POA but I may change the subject and talk about separation and guns. help
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It's great the doctor backed you up.

It's such a huge safety issue that I would make up my mind that no matter what, he is not getting the guns. I would remove them from the house. Eventually, he will adjust.

Even if they are locked up, on a good day, he could figure out how to work the lock. Or if there is a combination lock, on a good day, he figures it out. It's not worth it.

Also, there is no way to avoid a dementia patient never getting upset, angry or frustrated. It happens for any reason or no reason. Pleasing him sounds like it's very important to you and I really hope you don't let that hinder you from protecting yourself. If you are scared of him, get some family or friends to be there when he finds out the guns are gone.
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They are in a lock box now. But have to find a real hiding place. He is going to be so angry that I won't give him even 1 gun to look at. Oh well....
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He may not just "mistake you for a burgler".. he may get angry. My dad used to keep a gun by the bed, and one day he pointed it at mom, and she asked what he was doing.... he said I may just shoot you. Totally out of character, my mom was his sweetheart since grade school. Believe me the bullets all left the house ( we left the gun for his "safety" ). next step was all guns gone to our house and in the gun safe. Once they moved in here he once got into the safe while hubs was getting ready for hunting. He said.. are some of those my guns? Opps... No dad! just keep redirecting if you can, or say you had to take them to the shop to be be checked out,, whatever it takes! Or change the combo for the safe and pretend he did it... can't be opened with out the correct combo.. Good luck
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The next time he naps get the guns OUT of the house. Glad to hear you dealing with this.
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Tara, I have not had that experience and hope it all works out ok. Will hubby remember he had said ok? If there is a chance I would draft a short note for the doctor to puton his letterhead and sign just in case it becomes an issue. And I would do it soon. I understand the relationship some people develop with their guns from watching sons-in-law.
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