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He denies any problem and says we all make mistakes. Today he said a service man was coming for the furnace. That was 2 weeks ago and he had checked the calendar and couldn't remember today's date. I very worried and he doesn't want me to even bring it up with our doctor. I feel very torn and alone .

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Bring it up with your doctor, privately. Then the doctor can ask some questions the next time your husband sees him. Yes, we all make mistakes. The nature and the frequency of mistakes can be a matter of concern.
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Cleo, the early stages of dementia are very difficult for everyone. The one with it is very frightened because they know something is wrong. Their loved ones would like to ignore it, deny there is a problem, initially that seems like it would be easiest. But, the sooner dementia is an accepted diagnosis the better for everyone.
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This is tough. He is not going to realize something is wrong with him. Arguing with him about it will just make things worse. With my Dad, Mom and I just go with the flow, deal with repeated questions patiently, and stay on top of all household business and appointments. We fib a lot to get things done and when Dad forgets (everything) I might comment nicely that his memory is not as good as it used to be. He can handle that but not any talk that he has dementia.
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I am planning on seeing my GP next week to discuss the anxiety I'm dealing with and will bring up the subject of my husband. He's a very proud man and I feel quilty going behind his back.He always has an excuse for his lapses in memory so I'm not even sure if it falls in the normal range or is actually a real problem. Of course age could also be a factor. I have mentioned it to our 3 children and there is only one who listens to me and is supportive. The other 2 tell me I'm too hard on him . They are in denial that he is possibly having a problem. Thanks for all your suggestions and support. I get none from my extended family and I have 4 other siblings of whom I am the eldest!
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