By clicking Talk to a Specialist
for information about our privacy practices.
It's only human nature to get angry over things in which we cannot control, but please don't beat yourself up over it, as that serves no purpose at all. All of us that are or have been a caregiver will tell you(if we're honest)that we all have gotten angry at our loved one at one point or another. That's why taking care of yourself is so very important, as doing that will allow yourself more patience and understanding.
And if all else fails, you can do what one of the seasoned caregivers from my local support group recommends, and that is to go out on your back porch or patio and let out a big scream. She said it worked wonders for her, and I myself had to do it a few times as well, and yes it does help.
Which will bring me to my final point. Please "Google" to see if there are any local caregiver support groups in your area. I've belonged to one for over 3 years now, and they literally saved my life, as I was a wreck when I first started attending. Most are still meeting on Zoom right now, but as more things open up, they too will be meeting in person once again. I wish you the very best. Please take care of yourself.
The best part of anger is this energy can be used to motivate us towards that change.
I remember an acquaintance was angry at her husband's dementia behaviour. This prompted her to reach out for more respite - family helping & aides. She couldn't change him much, but could lighten her load.
I had seen my grandmother care for my grandfather and thought I understood what I was getting into but nothing prepared me for just how physically dependent people can become, how long people can go on that way, and how the person I was caring for became someone else, someone I once described as "a giant suck-hole of need". As the years passed I started to lose my temper and I would be filled with regret. The time between my outbursts became shorter and shorter, when I got to a point where I would get up in the morning strong and determined and blow it by 10:00 a.m. I knew it was time to make a change because I was seriously doubting whether the woman who had been my best friend was just an illusion - I sent mom to a nursing home for respite and never brought her back out. The nursing home was far from perfect and although she was well cared for the decision and her life there broke my heart, but the destructive spiral we were caught up in wasn't fair to either one of us.