Mom w ALZ forgets I visit, keeps asking when I'm visiting, also when she can go back to her house. My mom's ALZ is progressing. She doesn't remember something that happened 5 minutes ago. So she almost immediately forgets when i visit. She is in assisted living about 1 1/2 hours away. She's more confused as well. she asks frequently when i'm coming to visit, even if i was just there. Also says that she may want to go back to her house- she thinks the family still lives there. How do i respond in a way to keep things positive, and helps me not get frustrated and defeated? It's a catch 22, telling her i was just there will upset her, and i don't want to lie that i'm coming the next day. Any tips?
Alz is a terrible disease. I live it with My own Mother every day. Alzheimer's is some times called the silent thief because it robs the Sufferer of every thing. God help Them it's a horrible end to a beautiful Life. I pray that a cure will be discovered soon to this awful disease.
With my Mom  any time she wanted to visit her Mom I would say "We will go tomorrow" and that was all I said. That made her smile and she was content.... I knew she would forget about it after awhile.
My Mom would also want to go "home" but we knew "home" wasn't the house she had shared with Dad for the past 30 years, it was her childhood home that she wanted to visit.
Tell yourself that therapeutic white lies are permissible. You won't get struck by lightening if you use them.
Much of what I learned was also on this site, though I did not find it for about a year. The book "The 36 Hour Day" helped. Teepa Snow videos helped. It is using ALL resources available to us, taking what you think you can use and put it into practice. If some method does not work, then try something else. Never give up, there is an answer and the goal was to make Mom comfortable. Feeling guilty was not in my playbook. Only whatever it took!
Please try: Teepa Snow - Making Visits Count.
She makes these mini videos in progressive segments. So, that if you only have time to watch one video, then one. Or two videos, etc.... By watching her videos, it will help you know how to react with your mom's dementia.