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I just went through the death of my sister while in Hospice Care. I still am struggling with the care. Hospice is great in organizing everything. My struggle is that the strong meds were given even when my sister did not appear in pain. I never head anyone ask her if she was in pain. They always assumed that she was.


The morning that my sister passed, I feed her oatmeal and a protein drink. She drank an entire drink and asked me how it was that it tasted so good. The previous day, the home health care person said that her skin color did not look like she would die soon.


Back to the morning of her death, we were giving her the dosage of pain meds. Once Hospice directed us to give her more, when she awoke, my sister asked what was happening to her. Hospice continued to up her pain meds, and my sister never came out of it. I was so upset during this time seeing that they were giving her pain meds to make her system shut down. My sister could hear and at her last breath, she opened her eyes, and a tear rolled down her eye. How could a person go from being alert to a violent death.


My sister was in a facility prior to the Hospice care for rehab - she said they were trying to kill her too. My sister was very kind to me while she was alert, keep telling me she loved me. When Hospice told us we could be honest with her, she almost got of her bed and said to my sister, "don't leave me": That was about the last conversation that she had. They kept diving her the pain meds.


My sister was given so many pain meds, even prior to the Hospice care - the doctor's gave her an unlimited amount, and I think she got addicted. She would become mean spirited to a few people, never to me or my sister, but that is no reason to make a person's life go before their time. She was so kind to the home health care person! Thanks to that kind person. That person didn't treat her like she was dying.


I am having a hard time reconciling this process of Hospice!

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hi im sorry for the loss of your sister. its so overwhelming with ~feelings~ and responsibilities and trying to carry on with your own day to day duties. I don't think I read what illness your sister had? usually hospice means there is less than 6 months to live. I know some people have bad experience with hospice and some have good. I had good experience. but my dads death didn't come as a surprise to me, because he was very old and sick. you may feel suspicious of hospice is one thing. but because she was signed up for hospice, you shouldn't feel bad for doing that in my opinion. if she had a disease that was eventually going to take her life, then hospice probably did the best they could for her to transition. again im sorry. each death is different, and its impact on each person is different. I hope you find peace soon.
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