FIL has Alzheimer's and stage 4 Parkinson's Disease. I am perfectly okay with feeding him, making sure he's safe, getting him to his many doctor appointments. I am not okay with doing EVERYTHING for him when he is still capable of participating in his own life and well being. I get that Alzheimer's messes with his ability to think, to remember, to be whole. I also get the look on his face when he's manipulating. When he's just too darn lazy to do for himself. I am tired of being on his case constantly about everything. Jon told me his dad (adopted which he just found out) has always been inherently lazy. I hear when you age and our abilities to control ourselves are lessened that your character defects or assets (which ever are front and center) are magnified.....uh....yeah.
My question is this....do we just let him sit in his recliner and dwindle away? We are open to adult day care if we can find one we can afford and that will take him (he's urinary incontinent).So far they are way out of our budget. He is not Medicaid eligible. He does not have any liquid assets. We do have investments we can divest but are reluctant to do so as we foresee we will need them in the future to pay for his nursing/nursing home care.
FYI...my husband works full time to make ends meet. He helps however he can. We are at such a loss as to what to do but we both know something has to change. Looking for any suggestions/solutions.