Hearing but not understanding what I am saying to mom.

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Has anyone experienced elderly parents who state they can hear you, but cannot understand you and they feel left out and angry when they can't get what you are saying? I am prety good about speaking up and making sure she hears me and understands me, but the rest of my families members are not and it frustrates her.

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All hearing-impaired people can "hear" to some extent.....some more than others. However it's speech sounds that they cannot understand. These are mostly high frequency sounds that cannot be enhanced by a hearing aid or any other device for that matter. Closed Captioning is a blessing. you must begin to use gestures.
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My father o. Law lives with is and he has 2 hearing aids, still can't hear. I took him to audiologist and she said nothing more they can do. He hears the voice but cannot make out the words. We use closed caption and the volume is up. close caption moves pretty fast for an old guy. I think it this is why he enjoys music so much. Lawrence Welkom is his favorite show and he also has a bunch of Andre Ruhl DVD's. Music really calms him down too when he is anxious.
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I took my youngest son to an audiologist, and she did not understand the fact that he needed speech discrimination in his hearing aids. All the hearing aid dealers want to provide is amplification ( loudness). I want an additional hearing aid that will provide speech discrim and close-up only amplification. Just as a myopic-sighted person needs close-up glasses, a deaf person needs close-up amplification also. He already has aids that will provide hearing across the room and around the corner....loud! Don't tell me that the same aids can do both. I've already tried them on myself and all I get is loudness.
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The easiest way to be heard by your mother is not by speaking louder but by standing in front of her, face to face and enunciating words to the best of your ability. Lots of mouth, lip motion. This will bring out the language of the consonants. Good luck.
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Go to an audiologist. Get two new hearing aids that amplify high-frequency sounds ( speech). She'll love them.
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The statement of a hard of hearing person who says' "I hear you but I don't understand you" is readily explainable. No magic answers required.

Speech consists of two languages put together in a coded fashion, like the Morse Code of dots and dashes. Instead of dots and dashes we have vowels and consonants formed into coding. It so happens the consonants are many times quieter than the vowels and these to the deafened person are the first sounds of speech which disappear. There goes the loss of understanding, because now they are hearing just the one language, the language of the vowels. Without both parts of the speech, the vowels and the consonants, there is no understanding.
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what good advice I try to do the same with my mom and it works almost most of the time. Things are getting better once I implemented changes in myself and how I handle things.
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We have three loved ones who are cognitively impaired. Each struggles with hearing but not understanding. Due to Vascular Dementia, Alzheimer's or mental illness, they'll never learn ALS or thorough comprehension. We have to muddle through the best we can with compassion and smiles which reach across the miles of misfiring synapses. It's tough, but love, empathy, and God's grace are helpful in terms of their decline. Once they reach a certain point, it is us who must learn to bridge the gap, not them. Eye contact, body language, a gentle touch or warm embrace help loads. And each situation is individual. There is no set guidlines, except to just keep trying.
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I've aways said that ASL ( American Sign Language ) is not just for the hearing impaired. It is an ideal way to communicate with the sick, the physically disabled, those passing each other in a car, boat, train, bus etc., and of course those in a hospital with intubation, those in ICU, CCU, and those stroke victims who have diificulty communicating with speech. This list goes on.
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With my mother who has AD, she gets lost in conversation, she can't keep up and gets very paranoid and feels left out. She even starts to think that we're talking about her, laughing at her. She started this early on in the disease and even in the late stages responds the same way. I'm very careful to say something to her every few minutes to keep her thinking that she's included if there is conversation going on. She gets very, very upset and angry, even now, if she doesn't feel included. She does much better one on one.
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