A couple days ago I had a mini-meltdown at the nursing home where my mother resides. I yelled and screamed at everyone, the staff, the administrator, the social services people, and my sister. The incident that set me off was that the nursing home, with instructions from my sister, was getting, or should I say forcing, my mom out of bed and into her wheelchair every single morning at 8:30am. EVERY SINGLE DAY. I did not know this was happening. I had received several calls from my mom recently crying and hysterical and confused. I would drop what I was doing and drive down there and she would be visuably shaken. After several times of this happening I found out that my sister had placed an order in my mothers chart to get her out of bed every morning at 8:30am and into her wheelchair. I should have just calmly changed the order but I didn;t. Instead I became enraged. I just lost it! I couldn't believe my sister would make such a horrible request AND that mostly the nursing home would follow such an outrageous regiment. It hurt me so much to think my mother was being forced out of her bed at 8:30am every single morning, not even one day to sleep in, not a holiday, not even on a rainy day. I've been crying for days about it.
Now the orders are changed, my sister admitted it was not well thought out, the nursing home quickly removed the order from her chart. But the aftermath has left me shaken............I feel I can't go back into the nursing home. I feel "THEY" almost won.......they being my sister and the nursing home. My sister outdoes me at the nursing home. They love her, she is there more than me, she does alot for my mom,. I am unstable, an emotional wreck most of the time. My sister has better control of her emotions. I have always forced myself to go into the nursing home. I hate it there, it makes me sick. How do others make themselves go inside the nursing homes without one day exploding into a complete "I CAN'T TAKE THIS ANYMORE" incident? I can't keep living this way, I have to change.