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I guess it's partly not feeling confident enough to confront those that lack in helping family members in need......and then there is a part of me that thinks I should just do what I feel is right and not let what others do, or don't do, bother me.......but within that, I just cannot feel comfortable around them, siblings or not......it would be nice to have real thick skin sometimes but I can't pretend it does not bother me.......I really never feel like "poor me", I do so much more, it's really about having sisters in my life, that I cannot stand being around, or have any love for.........it's a catch22 sometimes, where you wish you had a lovey dovey family and then realizing it's just not that way........I actually fear funerals, or places where I might run into them because I am the one that gets frustrated and sometimes angry at seeing them and then they act like I am the one that is wrong.........it would not bother me in the least, to never see them again and I don't really feel bad about that, I just wish I could come to some inner peace over the whole thing..........

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I understand how you feel. Years ago I used to think that siblings should have a lifelong relationship, but I changed my opinion several years ago. I think anyone (whether we are related to them or not) who is energy-draining, selfish, negative, etc., I think it is better for our own emotional health to have "no contact" with them unless it is absolutely necessary. Fortunately, as time goes by, it gets easier and I think in time we tend to accept the situation.
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Glad to hear you're getting some therapy. For a variety of complex reasons I was never at all close to my brother and sister. I moved away from the home town 30 years ago and saw them at holidays and couldn't wait to get away from them. My sibs were not only no help with my parents as they aged, they and their screwed up lives were the cause of my parents pain and suffering for years. My sibs died within two years of each other my brother about 3 years ago. After the shock and grief my parents went through, in all honesty, their lives became much more peaceful and their health improved after losing these kids. Infused to feel guilty that I should have done more to help my sibs with their problems.(mostly addiction related. ) but I now know there's really not much I could have done. I don't feel guilty any longer. I'm dealing with my folks elder issues on my own. I still have anger towards my bro and sis but not so much that it interferes with my life. Sorry I rambled on here....it's good to hear from folks with similar situations. Good luck to you.
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it's nice to hear others acknowledge my feelings........and I do have an appointment coming up with a therapist...........but it's always great to hear from others, that either are going through similar situations, or simply understand.......this forum is a great highway for not only venting, or sharing feelings that we have but it also allows us to not feel alone through tough times......thanks
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Charley, the only perfect, lovey-dovey families I know are on TV. We were brought up on a steady diet of Leave it to Beaver and Father Knows Best, when real life is actually more like Mommie Dearest or Whatever Happened To Baby Jane. So, try to get past the sense that everyone else's family is perfect.

Second, talking to a therapist about this sort of thing can bring great clarity, or at least it did for me. Most of us have leftover simmering sibling issues that rear up under the stress of dealing with elderly parents. Seeing a therapist might be a great investment in your own future.
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I feel your pain. Know exactly what you are talking about. Just remember you are not wrong. You will find inner peace. Somehow, I have and it finally feels good. I thought I was the only one. It is just my sister and me and we are no longer on even speaking terms. Don't care anymore because I know in my heart I did the right thing for my parents.
Hang in there, you will be okay. Enjoy your life.
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