I live with my Mom (91) with first stage dementia. I'm the youngest of 3 daughters. Currently the ways I provide help are household maintenance, handling bills, preparing meals, taking to Doctors appointments, cooking, administering medication. She became a diabetic insulin dependent at 80.
Her medications are for blood pressure, statin and anti depressant. Other than that Doctor says she is fairly healthy.
My mom lost her Mom at age 4 from Tuberculosis. This left her father and younger brother. I guess back in those days the girl was supposed to take care of the males. Her father died when she was 16.
Anyway I'm grieving, and I think my Mom is too, the fact that she never had a mother. When we go to senior center memory care and they ask about the seniors parents everyone can share and I can see Mom's deep hurt. I feel my Mom has to go through this alone. No one to share the pain of losing both parents at such a young age. Her brother died at 60. Today the internet can help someone to not feel so alone.
I wish I could find a support group for Mom of other seniors that also lost their parents at very young age.
She said she decided at a very young age to become a nurse because she wanted to help others. Mom worked her entire life. She would make all the meals on Sunday to freeze for the week. Sewed all our clothes with love in every stitch. Had a garden of vegetables. Oh she was stubborn as hell to. I think because she didn't have a Mom she didn't learn boundaries (with 3 girls you can tell how well that went over) and went way over board to be sure we had "normal" childhoods where we could play.
I wish my Mom could feel a mother's love before she dies. I'll never be able to give her that.
thank you for listening