I am so grateful for all the sharing of stories! I came to NJ from Ca Dec 2016 to help my Dad cross (Feb 2016) He was my Moms (93 and sweet as pie) caretaker and they were married 60 years. I have siblings but I’m the one. Today at 4:30 she got up walked into the bedroom and went to bed without a word. I googled “why do people with dementia sleep a lot” and found you guys. I have read your posts, laughed and cried. Thank you! It’s nice to know that we are sharing this walk in life right now and in spite of the sadness can find humor and joy. Although mom isn’t the woman I knew it’s an honor to help her and get to know this new person who is so complex and surprising! Wishing us all the best!
You are definitely not alone. Me, too. I badly wished I had found this site before my father passed last year. There is so much wonderful support and comfort and information at this site.
There have been so many dark times when I have spiraled down emotionally and felt all alone in my troubles. I hate to see others suffering as well.. but I think with suffering comes great empathy and kindness towards others.
You will never know the effect of one encouraging post, a virtual hug, understanding advice... it all means so much.
So thank you.. I am grateful!
I'm also so grateful for all of the people in my life and my blessings. Whenever, I feel a little sorry for my situation, I think about those who really have it hard. Like those with dementia. It's hearbreaking. AND, I also saw a story on tv last night about a little boy who has a condition (genetic, from birth) in which his skin blisters and peels. He must constantly puncture the burns, clean and bandage them. Basically, it's like having deep burns all over your body. There is no cure and he will always live this way, if he is able to avoid infections and skin cancer. It made me weep and realize that my problems are not so severe.
I will always be grateful to this site, and all the posters who helped me away from the cliff's edge... I will always be grateful from reading all the different topics to help me handle my dad's verbal and physical abuses. To learn to stand up for myself without our usual yelling matches...and knowing that there were others here who had it sooooo much worse than me! O_O
Most importantly, I will always be grateful how the people here were My emotional and spiritual (not necessary religious) support group during my caregiving years. My previous therapist didn't think this counted as a support system for me. I disagreed with her. You all understood me better than any of my friends, family, associates, etc... Thank you!!!!
For you who have lost your loved ones already, I am sorry for your pain. And lizzy1952 I’m sorry to hear about your husbands recent diagnosis. Try and savor the time that you still have together.
Three years ago I also helped my husband cross over from multiple glioblastoma (brain cancer) which oddly enough my Dad also had! I was blessed to have known my husband and to be a part of his life.
When the Doc gave him the diagnosis his reply was “Well, I didn’t think I would live forever!” Something I keep in mind on this journey.
Being grateful is much easier when caring for a sweethearted person than a crabby one, but Yes, this is MY choice, my life and as long as I am following my heart and being authentic I am on solid ground.
Blessings and continued gratitude for you all!
I echo your sentiments! I only wish I found this site while my dad was first diagnosed with his stroke. Since his passing the support and understanding I have received has sustained me. I am filled with so much gratitude for all the kindness and support here. You all are amazing! Have a wonderful Thanksgiving weekend!!!
my caregiving days are not over as while caring for my parents I also care for my husband who has parkingsons disease . we just found out he also has prostrate cancer. I will continue to care for him and will continue to learn from everyone of you and hopefully my experiences can help you also.
god bless and have a wonderful holiday season....
The help and support of friends and family.
(and possibly the wisdom to know when to step away from an argument)
The idea that I was able to help my Husband through the last several years of his life with grace and strength that I never knew I had.
(It is amazing what we learn about ourselves and others during these times)
I am grateful for the AMAZING people that do Hospice work. It can't be easy knowing that every patient you care for will die.
(It is wonderful that they help to maintain grace and dignity when there is nothing left)
I am grateful that I have discovered that I am stronger than I thought.
(I thank God that I am a person that others in the same situation I have been in feel comfortable leaning on me for support)
I wish all a wonderful Holiday season.
Here is a quote I recently found.
We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned,
so as to have the life that is waiting for us.
Be strong, be well.....
This has been a year of many challenges for us on so many levels! I am so grateful to have this space to connect, learn, support and receive support.
I am grateful for the combined wisdom in this site, for each one of you, and for our hearts and our ability to share.
I am also grateful to be able to take a turkey sandwich picnic to the gardens of the Nursing Home my 96 year old Mom is in, so she can share in the Thanksgiving festivities too!
After my mother passed, I had 7.5 years of helping my dad. I wouldn't trade one of those days - I got to know my dad after all these years. It was an eye-opener!
And he got to know his daughters. When he left to be with Mom, he looked content.