Good caregivers are so hard to find...

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I don't have a question; just here to vent. My husband has two caregivers, and the one he bonds REALLY well with cannot work more than 2 full days. She has 2 other gigs elsewhere that she does not want to give up. I want to hire her for more days, and have offered to pay her more, but she does not want to. So, I have to keep looking for another one for the other three days. Finding a caregiver that your loved one bonds well with is soooooooooooooo hard!!!

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I was just thinking - even among family, not all caregivers are equal. Recently I was told by "a son" that he isn't squeamish. But you know something? I don't have time for squeamish - I just have to step up to the plate and do. "A Son" has never even offered to shave his dad, let alone clean his behind.

It left me wondering if he "isn't squeamish" as long as I am the one wiping the behind and cleaning up the occasional accident from floor and furniture.

So even with family, there is no guarantee that anyone/everyone will be a good caregiver.
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I agree with all the comments. Believe it or not, it may be good that the preferred caregiver wants to only caregive your dad for only a couple days. I have seen with my mom that caregiver fatigue can set in for both the caregiver and my mom if the caregiver is scheduled too many days. So we try and keep things "fresh" by using 3 or so caregivers - one for no more than 3 days a week - which seems to be effective. Meantime, do everything you can to create a good work situation for the favorite caregiver so she prefers you over the other clients and will be most likely to retain you if she ever has to reduce her workload.
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Grandma1954: What a wonderful choice of a nursing student as a caregiver! Your idea was genius!
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The best two caregivers I hired were recent graduates at the local community college. They have a Nursing program and in the state of Illinois students entering into the Nursing program must take a CNA course. The two that I hired were done with the CNA program and were entering the Nursing program. I told them I would work around their schedule and I did not mind if they studied while caring for my Husband as long as the studies did not interfere with his care.
The first year or so I had to go through an agency as the agency was contracted and approved by the VA. Later I was on a program, through the VA but oddly the requirement was that I had to hire people and I could not go through an agency. I had one good caregiver, one that was a nightmare, (she stole from me...long story but it was resolved to some extent) then the last 2 were Angels that made up for all the aggravation.
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Worried: Before I could arrive to be my mother's caregiver, I used trusted caregivers of her elderly friends. She already knew the women and was completely comfortable with them. If your LO has respected caregivers, you may want to try that approach.
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..... and very possibly, the other 2 'gigs' are also asking for more days and you then become one of the 'other 2 gigs' - - be thankful as it sounds like this caregiver also bonds with her patients and that is awesome.
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Finding the "right" caregiver is a process. Every client is different and certain caregivers are better suited for certain types. As an agency we filter out personalities before sending a caregiver based on our client assessment. We always try to get it right the first time but you need to accept the fact that some effort needs to be put into the search. , Without access to the hundreds of registered caregivers an agency has doing it privately can be very difficult.
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I hired caregivers through an agency for my dad. That agency has a policy that when providing 24/7 care, they can work up to 2 days straight with a client and then must have time off. We had our favorite, but I do understand why this policy is in place. Also, there is something said for developing a good report with more than one caregiver in case circumstances change for your favorite. On the other hand, I had a relative who employed a live-in full-time caregiver for her husband and it worked very well, but I'm pretty certain that the contract was private. I empathize with your situation, however. I have been in a situation where a caregiver arrived that was ill-prepared to assist my dad making it impossible for me to leave the house. Very stressful for all involved. After 5 hours, a replacement was provided who ended up working out for us quite successfully. It's definitely a process!
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Care Giving is something which naturally creates burnout syndromes in all adults. Think back to when your own children were young, if you have children, or perhaps when you first bought a pet. The constant "caring" for someone else before your own needs can cause you to become less proficient/professional. Care Givers are highly under-rated, under-paid and also taken advantage of by many agencies. However, there are those agencies or private individuals who already know this and offer their services as stated this week, only a few shifts at a time. If nurses are regulated not to work more than three 12 hour shifts in hospitals, for years now, the evidence is already proven. Care for yourself so you can offer your loved one the "best of you". Otherwise, move on. With healthcare providing less and less alternatives this is likely to become our next global "movement". I certainly hope so, for everyone's sake. (Credit In Heaven)
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I am happy if they can keep my aunt safe, and play with the dog.
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