I really think I know the answer to this. I am so "programmed" with not going out of town and missing out on so much, because mom lived with me for nine years prior to the nursing home. She has been in a home for a year and hates it, but we thought she would. She is going downhill mentally and physically, despite the home's effort to walk her and encourage her to be active. I do feel like they are doing all they can and we are happy with her care.
I haven't been out of town in 8 years, because I couldn't leave her alone. Four siblings, three live out of town and one is here part of the year and in FL during the winter.
I am sure other people take vacations and trips while their parents are in a home, but I still feel guilty going! My niece and her hubby keep telling me that is why she is in a home, so they can care for her. They are wanting me to come and visit them, so they keep bringing it up.
I guess I just need to get it through my mind that I am free, I can go. If an emergency comes up, they can call me and I can come home. She is very dependent on me, always wanting to call me. When other family members are there, she wants them to call or text me.
Is this normal, on both our parts?