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Mom has Altzheimers and has lived with me for 8 years. She pays her own way at day care and for part time sitters. I carry her to daycare, shopping, and doctors. Each day I help her bathe, dress, fix breakfast, give pills and do breathing and other treatments as well. At night I do the same thing and laundry. The past year has been rough for me financially. I would like for mother to pay me for 5 hrs a day at the same rate she pays her other sitters. I asked irs about this and they said it might be a problem since she was living in my home but they did not provide me with a definitive answer. It seems to me that I should be able to get paid like the other sitters. Does anyone know the rules?

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Is there a generic form for caregiver/sitters to sign for taking care of someone?
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Can people get paid to take the elderly to doctors appts, grocery shopping etc. It appears many ppl can still do there own shopping and going to the dr but cant drive. I think it is important for them to feel independant and would like to know if medicare or medicaid help pay someone for this. Thanks
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I have found tha t calling the creidt company directly usually takes care of the problemmand what mI also do it call the company their number should be on the credit report and I tell them the DAs of my state and county anduse there names do not like scammers and will take action but the credit card company usually helps since you did not sign for the service and it sounds like your mother used the card without your permission since you did not even know about it in the first place-it is to your advantgage that she used your credit card. Their numner in on the back of the card and it should have been on your statement- my husband some how signed up for a service and we had been paying monthly for two years and when I took over the bills I noticed it and called the company and they were not helpful so called the credit card and got my money replaced into my credit it was only 260.00 but I got it taken care of easily and one time he ordered a pearl necklace and it was junk and by calling the credit card company we got a considerable amount of money returned, Good luck.
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My mom passed february 23 ,she left behind alot of debt but one of her bills has my name on it,i never knew about this until we were going through her items and found it,i had my credit report pulled for the first time and its on my credit report,i was told to write a letter to the company,but i don't know how to start or exactly what to say,can someone out there PLEASE help me. Super lost and frustrated!!!
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Is anyone the Power of Attorney of the parent? Does POA have a different turn on how I can be paid or 'pay' myself for this loving yet 'hard job'?
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I'M NOT UNDERSTANDING THAT AT ALL KEN.. PARENTS ARE ALLOWED TO GIVE THIER KIDS UP TO $10K A YEAR WITHOUT ANY PROBLEM.. OR A LARGER AMOUNT PRORATED... MY MOM DID THAT WITH MY BROTHER AND I THREE YEARS AGO. ALL WAS REPORTED TO THE IRS ON HER NOT OUR TAX RETURNS.. IT WAS A GIFT.. I HAVE NO CLUE WHY THIS LAWYER DREW UP PAPERS ON THIS KINDA STUFF AT ALL OTHER THEN TO MAKE MONEY OFF OF YOU..
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Ok folks, Here is the way all this paying for services stuff works. I am speaking for my state of Massachusetts,but I am sure other states have similar laws. My father has been living with me for 5 months and has been paying me $1,000 monthly. You have to draft a legal contract between you and the person that is receiving the care. You both agree on a price and the services that are being given and have them notorized and witnessed. The reason I am charging my dad this amount is because I am building an addition and this is the only way to pay for it. You cannot take money unless you are providing a service in return. You must list all services you are providing for the person to justify what you are charging them! Even though I am having a room built, I cannot make him pay for it in the lump sum or having him give me a large gift of money. The reason for having the contract done is to show and justify all money that is being transferred to you from the person being taken care of. This way if they ever have to go on state aid( Medicare )you will not have to pay back the money or pay a penalty. They will usually go back 3-5 years so be careful what you spend and how. You will have to prove all that you spend.Even after you have the contract done, you must keep a paper trail of all receipts and payments made or you may have to verify them later. I actually had a lawyer write up my contract, but you may be able to find something on one of these web sites and to it without a lawyer.
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pudinpie1
sorry that is not the solution is to put my dad in a nursing hm i would never do that my family is being vindictive and thats all my dad chose me above them and now look my dad has not lasted he in the hos now becasue of my selfish sisters and brother he is sick now and they tried to hid it from us he has pnumonia now i have beeen gone two weeks so regardless if i spent my dad money or not i took dame good care of him i lost two good jobs because my family didn't want to help me but they wanted to take me to court but they can't even take care of him but they want control they can't even control their own HOME
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SAD TO SAY BILLSGIRL.. NO THERE ISN'T. NOT UNLESS YOUR MOTHER IF SHE IS OF SOUND MIND AGREES TO PAY YOU X AMOUNT PER MONTH FOR HER CARE. IT'S AS SIMPLE AS THAT.
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i too am in the same position as the others above. i had been caring for my mother and dad. he at his house and mom at hers. going from each others house until dad died about three years ago. he left me his house and the rest of mortgage on it. so i moved mom to my house. well we have 14 stairs to just get to the front door. so we have moved back to mom's house since she has only the poarch to step up on. i can't not work anymore for caring for my 80 year old mom. my husband gets ss ck every month which isn't much concidering we have to pay the mortgage on our house. i am 52 but not old enough to retire. isn't there compensation for the caregivers who can't work and caring for their parents?
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FOLKS... HERE IS THE DEAL. IF YOUR PARENT OR WHOEVER YOU ARE TAKING CARE OF IS OF SOUND MIND. YOU SHOULD SIT DOWN AND TELL THEM THAT YOU NEED TO BE PAID FOR TAKING CARE OF THEM AND SET A PRICE FOR THE CARE PERIOD. IF NEED BE HAVE THE PARENT SIGN AND DATE AN AGREEMENT WITH YOU AND HAVE TWO WITNESSES SIGN IT ALSO IN FRONT OF THE ILL PERSON. ONCE THAT IS DONE, YOUR PARENT SHOULD PAY YOU WHATEVER THE AGREED AMOUNT IS PERIOD. IF THEY WERE IN THE CARE OF A PRIVATE CARE GIVER LIKE MY AUNT IS SINCE SHE HAD A STROKE... SHE IS PAYING THEM $4500 A MONTH FOR 24/7 CARE.
I HAVE CARED FOR MY MOTHER IN MY HOUSE FOR THE LAST THREE YEARS. ABOUT A MONTH AGO, SINCE MOM HAD BOTH MY BROTHER AND I ON HER CHECKING AND SAVINGS ACCOUNT, HE WENT AND GOT A FEW MONTHS OF HER BANK STATEMENTS FROM HER CHECKING ACCOUNT. THIS WAS DONE WHILE MOM WAS IN THE HOSPITAL FOR A MONTH AND TWO DAYS WITH CONGESTIVE HEART FAILURE AGAIN.
NEXT THING YA KNOW.. HE IS CALLING ME ACCUSING ME OF STEALING MONEY FROM MY MOM.. I ASKED HIM IF HE WAS NUTS. HE STARTED LISTING THE FACT THAT SHE PAYS THE UTILITES HERE IN MY HOUSE.. THIS IS SOMETHING WE BOTH AGREED UPON WHEN SHE MOVED IN HERE. I HAD TO BUY A HOUSE IN ORDER TO CARE FOR HER CUZ MY DUPLEX WAS JUST TO SMALL AND HAD STAIRS SHE COULD NOT USE DUE TO SEVERE NEUROPATHY IN HER LEGS DUE TO DIABETIES.
SO THE DEAL WAS THIS.. SHE PAID THE UTILITIES. I MAKE THE HOUSEPAYMENT, PAY THE TAXES AND INSURANCE ON THE HOUSE AND WE BOTH PUT IN $200 A MONTH FOR GROCERIES AS WE BOTH LIKE TO EAT GOOD AND GROCERIES ARE EXPENSIVE. ALL THIS IS STUFF MY BROTHER FEELS IS ALL PERSONAL AND MOM SHOULD NOT BE PAYING ANYTHING.
MOM ALSO HAS AT TIMES TOLD ME TO TAKE A HUNDRED HERE OR A COUPLE HUNDRED AND GO DO SOMETHING FOR MYSELF OR BUY SOMETHING I NORMALLY WOULDNT BUY...
WHEN HE ACCUSED ME OF STEALING FROM MOM. I WENT BALISTIC ON HIM. I TOLD HIM HOW MUCH MY AUNT IS PAYING FOR 24/7 CARE AND IF HE WANTED ME TO I COULD LEAGLY CHARGE MOM THE SAME.. THERE IS A SET PRICE OF $30 AND HOUR IN THE STATE OF ILLINOIS.
SO IF HE WANTS TO ARGUE ABOUT ANY OF THE PIDDLY SHIT MOM HAS GIVEN ME OVER THE LAST THREE YEARS, BY GOD I WAS READY TO.
I CALLED MY LAWYER AND EXPLAINED WHAT MY BROTHER WAS ACCUSING ME OF. HE TOLD ME TO FORBID MY BROTHER FROM COMING TO MY HOUSE AND IF HE SHOWED UP TO CALL THE POLICE AND HAVE HIM REMOVED FROM MY PROPERTY.
THIS IS A GUY WHO LIVES 7 MILES FROM MY HOUSE.. VISITED MOM MAYBE ONCE A MONTH AND STAYED FOR A HALF HOUR OR SO.. AND HAD THE GALL TO TELL ME IT'S HIS MONEY TOO!!!! I SAID EXCUSE ME.. ITS NOT YOUR MONEY OR MY MONEY.. ITS MOMS AND NO ONE ELSES AND SHE HAS A RIGHT TO DO WHATEVER SHE WANTS TO WITH IT...
SINCE THEN I HAVE NOT HEARD FROM HIM AT ALL. I HAVE BEEN TOLD BY TONS OF FOLKS TO START CHARGING MY MOM AT LEAST 2K A MONTH FOR HER CARE AND JUST BANK THE MONEY. I CAN'T DO IT THOUGH.. TO ME ITS JUST NOT RIGHT... BUT IF MOM GIVES ME MONEY OR BUYS SOMETHING FOR ME.. I ACCEPT IT WILLINGLY. I HAVE WOKED MY BUTT OFF TAKING CARE OF HER AND HAVE PUT MY OWN LIFE ON HOLD ALSO. I CAN'T GO ANYWHERE AT ALL WITHOUT FINDING SOMEONE TO CARE FOR HER WHILE I RUN TO THE STORE OR WHEREEVER ELSE I NEED TO GO... AND I TOLD MOM SHE HAS TO PAY THESE PEOPLE $10 AN HOUR TO CARE FOR HER WHEN I NEED TO DO THINGS.. SHE AGREED TO IT...

THE PROBLEM LIES IN THE MENTAL STATE OF THE PATIENT YOU ARE CARING FOR. IF THEY ARE FINE..YOU CAN CHARGE THEM IF THEY AGREE TO IT.. IF THEY ARE NOT GOOD MENTALLY.. THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT... AT THAT POINT IT BECOMES STEALING .... AND SAD TO SAY THERE IS NOTHING YOU CAN DO ABOUT IT EXCEPT PUT THE PERSON IN A NURSING HOME AND LET THE GOVERNMENT TAKE CARE OF THEM...
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I am taking care of my mom and my son and it is very hard.Both my mom and son was admitted in the hospital at the same time,he was in a car accident and she had two heart attacks back to back and on top of that i lost my job,I have older siblings but they are worthless,I'm at my wits ends because all this is new to me and overwhelming.I'm also wondering how to get payment for caring for my family members.
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rick
i understand what your talking about but the thing is my family all have borrowed money from my dad and has not paid him back the ones that took me to court now its rap into what im suppose to pay back thats not FAIR AT ALL but all i can say is my dad didn't start getting bad til early this yr but you can't tell them nothing they are running the show now after i have since my mom passed and it been 5 yrs it hurts and i will never forgive them for this im currently writing a book about them my family and boy when all this get out i will have the last laugh it not about getting back at them its that like i said before i gave up my life for 5 yrs and more and THIS is the thanks i get. i did my part with my mom and dad they haven't, didn't and never will except now because my 59 yr old sister needs a place to stay she doesn't want to take care dad she just needs a olace to stay but every dog has their DAY!!!!!!!
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ARE WE ALOWED TO USE OUR PARENTS MONEY TO PAY FOR THINGS AND PAY FOR OUR TIME. MY MOMS INS WANTS A CO-PAY EVERYTIME THEY COME TO HER HOUSE, OF 20.00. WHY CAN THEY TAKE IT. MY MOM ALSO GAVE ALL OF HER KIDS AND STEP SONS $$ AFTER MY STEP DAD PASSED AWAY. THEN AND SHE HAS GIVEN GIFTS OF MONEY IN THE PAST 4 YEARS. NOW SHE IS NOT DOING GOOD AND I WOULD NEVER LET HER GIVE MONEY ANYMORE BECAUSE SHE NO LONGER UNDERSTANDS THAT I THINK WE COULD GET INTROUBLE. LIKE MY DAUGHTER LOST HER JOB, FIRST THING OUT OF MY MOMS MOUTH WAS IF SHE NEEDS HELP GIVE IT TO HER. CAN I? WHAT ABOUT THE GIFTS SHE GAVE. I NOW AM THINKING OF ASISTED LIVING FOR HER. DOES ANYONE KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT THE $$$ STUFF. MOM HAS A IRA ACCOUNT BUT IS THERE ANYTHING LEFT AFTER WHATS HAPPEND TO THE STOCK MARKET. SOME ANSWERS WOULD BE GREAT.

TRACY
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Yes You may think and feel like You are screwed But Do not Think twice on that thought ,You know why? We Have Much more in us then we think,Ever read a book called (In the hands of a healer) by Jeffery Pierce.I will send You a Preview. This book explains alot about how we all have a purpose in Life,and I am Sure Yours is gonna be a Great one.
Thank You My friend
rick
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barbees
i tried that it did'nt work i don't know who can help me i will just pay back i guess i don't know what to do im very hurt i cry everynite thinking why my family did this i have an older sister she didn't even want to take care of our mom she just doing this cause she has no place to stay so they all got together took me to court and now making me move out and her and 13 people in her family move in its not gonna be good for dad you not suppose to change on a alz patient like that but they don't care they never did they don't even come and see him i heard thru the grapevine the reason why they don't come down here is becausee of me the bull no one will keep me from seeing my parents i don't care what the circumstances are she didn't care about mom and i know she don't care about dad the thing is i wouldn't lend her no money she can't even take care of her home she been envicted out so many places since my mom pass an as of today my mom been gone for 5 yrs, now i must remind you she is 58 yrs old she builds her life around her kids she has no husband nothing this all started this summer so im screwed
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Aren't families (WONDERFUL) ha,ha .If they only knew what we (caregivers) go through. Sometime I just wish we could reverse the rolls on them. Let them give up their lives and take care of the family member. I wouldn't trust my sister with my mother for 1 day let alone for what seems like eternity. We had a tornado tear the roof off our house in 2003 so mom went and stayed with my sister. Sister started complaining that mom was getting mean and grouchy,I checked her pills, here she wasn't taking them ,for 3 weeks !! No wonder she was mean.My sister said that she saw mom take water up with her at night so she figured she was taking them. I told her that mom is like a 4 year old child now and that you have to watch her. msbruse, I can relate ,check with legal aide they might help you.
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shoot get real you guys there isn't a soloution to this problem i have been taking care of my dad and he told me a few yrs back if i needed anthing to use his money well.at the time i didn't it was hard for to hold a full time job i couldn't get anyone of my family members to help me and i choose to work nights so someone could come in the daytime why i got some sleep oh no! that was a big issue and i come from a family of 12 and you would think i was the only child. so when i did use it i endd up in court got my dpoa snatch from so now me my family has to move out we have to be out by jan 31st my family is vindictive they were wrong i gave up my life and time to take care of my dad and this is the thanks i get now i half to pay back what i can't show for that i spent on him or his house or i will do 5 yrs in jail.
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I Have been taking care of my 82 year old father for over five years now and have been on welfare. Can i recieve payment for doing this?
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I called our office of the ageing because a social worker assured me we could get low cost home care but when I called them our small income of our pensions and medicare was too much to qualify for us. Also a nursing home told us we could use paratranist for visits to M.D.s but I found out we live 1/4 mile too far from a bus line-you have to be careful depending on experts advice- they really should keep up on there information.
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You might be able to get some pay directly from the state for taking care of your parent if your parent has few assets and little income. Your parent might qualify for home care through Medicaid. But instead of getting that care from a Medicaid home care agency, it might be possible – depending on the rules in the state where you live -- to have the state pay your parent directly. She could then use the money to pay you for taking care of her. In some states, this kind of cash assistance is possible even your parent has slightly too much income or assets to qualify for Medicaid.

All this depends on your state having a program called Cash and Counseling, or a similar program. Your parent can apply for Medicaid and Cash and Counseling, or for a similar state cash assistance program, at your local Medicaid office. To find the local Medicaid (social services) office near you, contact the Eldercare Locator by phone toll-free at 800-677-1116, or go online to any search engine and type in the word Medicaid plus the name of your state. Good Luck, Ila
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i take care of my mother,i know there is a program that pays for doing this but i dont know how to find out more info
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i also take care of my mother-in-law she gets a check but her other daughter seems to take most of it, I heard I could Maybe get some kind of help from the IRS because she is not staying in Gov Housing anymore thanks for taking the time to read this post
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My mother has alzheimer's too. I've checked into possibly getting paid too. I live in ohio there is a phone number for the Ohio District 5 on Aging that I called they said that I would have to be certified and call a group called Passport. First of all I have been taking care of my mom for almost 5 years now. I was an aide in a nursing home for 3 years,but was never certified.So why do I have to do that? Next,Passport, my neice's grandmother was on that. When she passed they came in and took everything. Her father was her grandmothers caregiver and lived there. They evicted him and auctioned off the house. When I asked them (Passport) about that, they said that it was to recover some of the expenses that she had. So if anyone out there has any idea as to where we as family caregivers can go to find some kind of financial help please holler loud and clear.
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I'm very confused. Why does my comment about caring for my mother with Alzheimer's Disease and Breast Cancer and it's related issues related to being paid a somewhat larger amount that $200 per month and my question about why the goverment does not address the needs of caregivers who are doing the right thing trying to keep their loved ones at home as long as possible thereby necessitate some form of perhaps insurance warrant a notation that says ......................."Suggest Removal" ???
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I want to know the answer too. I take care of my mother with Alzheimer's Disease and Breast Cancer 24/7 except for 3 hours each day Mon.-Fri. when we have a companion take her out to lunch and walk for exercise at the mall and see her sister. The only other help I get is that my sister takes her on Sunday from 10:30 am to 2:00 pm and additionally is her Power of Attorney and pays her bills. The companion gets paid $10 per hour and that adds up to $600 per month. My sister allows my mother to pay me $200 per month and is unhappy about that. I have no insurance, no 401k, no savings, no retirement, am divorced, have no children to turn to for help me in my old age and am determined to keep my mother at home and out of the system for every last second I can in her own home because she deserves that much at least. I love my mother very much. I don't regret the responsibility. I see it as an honor and a privilege to care for my mother and will continue to do so. However, I am 49 years old I want to know what if anything the government does for caregivers who are left without insurance or can't get even Medicaid and live below the poverty level in order to keep family members out of nursing homes and the Medicare/Medicaid system thus making my mother a tax burden to society.
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