I had wonderful older relatives - Grandparents and Aunts and Uncles - who brought joy and care into my life. I miss them very much and took every opportunity while they were alive to let them know how much they meant to me.
My parents, who are divorced for many years and getting closer to death due to advanced age, seem to fear death.
I am sure the reason is because they have treated their children with such a lack of regard. They are both going all out in a sympathy bid VERY late in life.
This is the reason they fear death. Because they were unkind to their children their whole lives.
It is nice to be charitable and offer consolation to people as they age. However they cannot “take back” a lifetime of ill will that has left a deep impression on their family.
Those who are kind leave a deep impression of kindness. They receive genuine care and concern later in life and they do not fear their life has been “worthless”.
Those who have been selfish and unkind often reflect in the 11th hour that “no one cares”. That is because they have created that legacy themselves.