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My brothers and I have promised to do all jobs on his long list in a timely fashion but it is not good enough. We said we will paint the cottage in the month of july but he has demanded right away. we are all workers and must do things as time permits. He is taking the ladders and doing it himself. I think we should take his ladders away..two out of town brothers say no

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Some 85-year-olds can do just fine on ladders. Other's shouldn't be near one. The big issue is that your father wants to be independent and get things done. You, rightly, don't want him to take unnecessary risks. Taking away his ladders may seem to him like taking away his ability to make his own decisions, so assess carefully the physical risk of letting him do what he wants against the move of taking away his ladders. He may just go out and buy another one, and you will have drawn a line in the sand.
I can't say whether you should or should not do. Your family will have to decide. But do talk it over carefully and realize the risk both ways. This is something many of us have to deal with. There's no one right answer.
Take care,
Carol
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