we need an ongoing thread to share our failures ond / or accomplishments each day. some of them could be pretty humorous. remember in morgan county indiana we say " it aint braggin if ya done it.
I'm going to make everyone feel good. I got absolutely nothing worthwhile done today. No cleaning, no laundry, no yard work, no work on my shop, no shopping for inventory or anything else. Nothing, nada.
Besides the regular work that's being done on my teeth, I've had several emergency procedures done in the last 3 weeks. My failure was not going by my instincts (pull them all and get dentures) instead of being talked into "saving what we can". Now were almost a 5,000 already, and the ones we were trying to save, have caused the most pain and wasted time,effort and money. My Accomplishment is INSISTING the dentist give me emergency pain pills, since the problems usually happen on the weekend. Lesson learned....go with my gut, it's always right.
Very well done Allison you deserve a gold star for that endevour. Those man parts can be quite a challenge. Putting on a pair of gloves can make the touching easier. Rubber not leather!!!!!!!!!!!!
Hospice nurse had not called so didn't wait this time, went ahead, got yard raked, mowed, storm came, re raked yard, then clipped all the ivy and pruned the shrubs..ALL before the nurse ever called. Have gotten Mama changed again, fed her lunch and am now having a glorious "me" moment!!!! Yards look perfect! I may do some more out there, may not, either way looks mahvelous! Proud of ME!
Tonight I managed to change my father's catheter clip and it was no big deal... I'd previously been trying to get him to do it, the nurses have shown him how to do it a few times, but he's simply not going to, he doesn't seem to have the ability/skill to pay attention to his care much at all, for whatever reason. So even though I knew it needed to be done once a week, I was just resisting doing it myself because it meant having my hands very near my father's manparts. Well, tonight I gave him a bowl of beef and noodles and while he sat on edge of his bed and ate it, I changed the clip like it was the most normal activity in the world. I'm a PRO now, I tell ya!
Failure:
Eh, probably just that I'm not being as productive as I'd like to be these days, spending lots of time on social media sites and watching videos on Internet. I think my father's super sedentary ways have rubbed off on me a little.
Thanks, CM - we live in a TEENY house - 2 bedrooms (1 is Dad's old room and is kind of a junk room right now), Mom sleeps in the living room - has for years - and I sleep in my old childhood bedroom/laundry room. One bathroom, the size of a small walk in closet - no lock. She will let me help her in and out of the shower now - a recent development - but the pad issue persists. She has taken to going into the bathroom and just sitting on the toilet until she starts dozing off. I don't know if she just wants to be alone and that's the only way to do it or what the situation is - I've asked her, and she just says she's "thinking". Unfortunately, while she's sitting in there for up to 30 minutes, "thinking", she forgets that she needs to change her pad, forgets to wipe and forgets to flush. These are all very recent developments, but all seem very par for the course with the decline/early dementia advancing at a steady pace. Since I've moved in, she has improved in some ways (like personal hygiene and showering, because I insist on it), but declined in others (like not doing much of anything for herself other than toileting and showering). Her mobility and memory have declined.
Susan, I don't know if there's still a lock on your mother's bathroom door? We took ours off once I started having nightmares about her falling while she was in there, because she promised faithfully she wouldn't lock the door and ALWAYS did. Anyway; so now when she "pops through" [to go to the loo, that is] I strategically time following her and ask her if I can help her with a clean pad - she always says yes, and because she's not actually in the act, as such, it's less of a privacy problem. You do have to keep your ears open and catch her at the right moment, though. Still! - better than that depressing odour. My mother made me promise, many years ago, that if she ever started to (wrinkles her nose) smell "like that" I would tell her. So far so good and I haven't had to! - but if she were still in charge of pad-changing I think she'd have got quite tired of that particular conversation by now.
i was getting overstimulated in the head so went to va this am , dont want complications . doc said not manic , not hallucinating , just wired . theres something she just isnt finding . i know what it is -- freaking exitement . the treatment was sprung on me unexpectedly , then worked in a matter of days , now only 3 weeks left -- who wouldnt be flipping out ? hepc is a m - f . its all about fatigue . i dont need fatigue , got things to do ..
Oh, and I should add that I'm adding to my long list of chores every day that now I need to check/change the bathroom trash 3-4 times a day to make sure she's changing that pad, because she obviously doesn't remember to do it, or thinks she did - but didn't. Not blaming her for it, of course, but boy that's frustrating....
Great news on no trucks, Veronica! CM and Judda it seems so hard sometimes, doesn't it....all we want is what's best for them, but this d*mn disease (dementia/ALZ) robs them of even the most common sense and turns them into someone who has to be watched every moment.
10am and already a failure for me. Got upset with Mom because she told me all day yesterday that she had changed her incontinence pad every time I asked her - yet when I changed the trash bag this morning in the bathroom, it was empty. At one point yesterday, her pad was so soaked it literally fell out of her undies and slid down her leg onto the floor - I came out of my room after folding laundry and found her holding in her hand, trying to hide it. (sigh)
I didn't get upset in the sense that I was yelling or anything, but I did sit down and remind her (again) that she needs to change her pad frequently, or everything in the house smells like urine. She got all defensive and swore up and down that she changed it several times yesterday - I brought her the trash bag and showed her that she hadn't. She looked very confused and said she thought she had changed it. Then I showed her the protective pad from her chair that had a large stain on it from her sitting on it. So, she went and changed it (I checked the trash) and then laid down without showering, in her smelly nightgown. Argh!
I am trying so hard to let her retain some of her independence and not take over every aspect of her life, but darn it....this stinks.
It is 8.24 am and not a single 18 wheeler has gone past the house. We moved onto this forgoten dead end road a couple of years ago off a fancy estate but now it has been discovered and a buiding frenzy has erupted. The lots are wooded 5 acres and quite steep but for the last few days 18 wheelers have been rumbling past hauling dirt to level a lot. people want level lawns and a landscaping service!!!!!!!!! I like my rocks
Juddha, this might help: imagine how that scenario looked to the handsome young man. What do you think he was thinking? Well, quite a variety of things, of course, but one for certain: he would have been impressed that you are big-hearted enough to be kind to your elderly mother even when she doesn't deserve it.
When someone is making fun of us, it's hard to remember that witnesses/observers are most unlikely to agree with that someone. But it's true.
Still bloody annoying to have an enjoyable conversation brought to an abrupt end, of course, but better annoying than hurtful.
And maybe cut back her outing rations, especially when you have something better to do? Not to hurt or punish her, but why make the sacrifice if it isn't really necessary?
I think I would just have to terminate the conversation I was enjoying and apologise saying "Mom has dementia we have to move onI am alone" You did well Judda
Success: Overcame my need to be alone on a nice sunny cool day and took Mom to do errands and to the conservation park. She was grateful. But then there was a handsome young man who was enjoying a conversation with me and Mom decided to get attention by butting in and then making fun of me in front of him. Success: not taking it all in and burning with rage: just mildly annoyed. What would you do with this behavior? My mother is normally a nutcase but otherwise healthy. I am thinking: I can't change her. Being defensive or angry just makes her harder to deal with so standing up for myself becomes my own punishment. Adopting an attitude of apathy. Any suggestions? Talking in a nice way doesn't work. I don't know if anything but ignoring her works for me. It's a no win every time. She does this more and more often because she can't hear or respond to people appropriately more and more. She'll be 93 this week.
As soon as I get rid of the tight feeling in my chest I shall dance a little jig. Mother has been rebelling over the use of her walking frame AGAIN. And does this matter? Well, if you picture Tom from Tom & Jerry, drunk as a lord, making his way home and reeling and tottering and bouncing from lamppost to lamppost, that describes my mother's progress across the living room on a good day if she's not using her frame. And she's not even drunk. Her logic is that if she's only moving around ***within*** the room, it doesn't count and she doesn't need her frame. And it makes her feel like a cripple, she says. And I do make a fuss, she says. And her hearing aids are hurting, all of a sudden, so she's taking them out now and it has nothing to do with not wanting to continue the conversation, she says.
And all I said in response to all this was: "Mother. Use your frame."
Can I have my medal for not blowing up and lecturing her for the 6,258th time now, please?
Actually I will settle for a gin and tonic, which I am off to pour. Hope everyone's had a good day.
accomplishment -- taking today off and even napping for 3 hrs. long story , about feeling so good i cant be held back , mixed with the nurses voices in my head telling me not to overdo it ..
Note to self: absolutely MUST take before/after pics of the work on the house. Ripping up the RED & BLACK CARPET IN THE KITCHEN has already made a world of difference! Can't wait to see how it looks once the 1970's dark wood paneling is ripped down, the walls painted and the floors refinished.
Failure for yesterday - had a complete and total meltdown and posted it on here in another thread. Feeling somewhat better today. I guess everyone needs to vent now and then, but I felt bad for posting it. Should probably keep rants like that to myself.
Accomplishment: Picked up the paint and supplies for the upcoming work on the house, contacted the city office and discussed the permits needed for possible extension of the deck and paving of the driveway (deck may not be possible, but driveway definitely is), and checked pricing on the varnish needed to refinish the wood floors in 2 rooms and a hall in the house - $200 on top of what I just spent for the paint and supplies, so that's going to have to wait another week or two.
Planned accomplishment for tonight: catch up on all this freakin' work so I can invoice my clients, which should have been done over the weekend!
switching to a molly hatchet concert. they still rock but it appears a couple of em have spent their fortunes on good food. the cats arms barely reach his guitar is what im implying here .. rather humorous.. what has a total of 60 feet and 20 teeth ? the front row of spectators at a molly hatchet concert..
lol, doc asked me if id only had one beer . i told her one was all i was admitting to . her job is getting answers , mine is evading them so lets dance doc.. i must have already died, im under the care of a total of 7 unbelievably hot looking women right now. that isnt even counting the receptionist . i play the dumbazz but i know theyre having as much fun as i am .. the indy va rocks !!
ba8ata, i suggest emails for all business. one can proof what theyre sending, and the business covered is indesputable later . i had a great day . took edna for early morn , fasting blood test , then to see her SIL in a nearby town and still got 4 hours of wood cutting in . poured rain all day, it felt lovely on these dehydrated bones .. often i cant tell you what day or even what month it is . who cares ? if its nice i work, if it rains the work shifts to the garage. got busted on a surprise drug screen at va. couple of zans , couple of beers . sue me , im not running for chief commander of nato , just kill the d*mn hepc. lol .. they were all nice about it and in fact werent all that surprised .. my punishment is biweekly visits with doc ly*on . bummer, shes hottern hammered hell .. listening to a h*llish good alice concert and cooking edna some apples and rice.. lifes only going to get better , thats whats incredible.. family cookout for ednas 91 st b -day sat night. normally wouldnt be interested but wth ? ive got the firewood b**ches . lol
Ah, Sharyn, I have such happy memories of the entire family playing hunt-the-lemon-squeezer… It's become a figure of speech for me and my kids. Good feeling, clearing out a cupboard :) I did the medicine cabinet today, my word it felt virtuous.
Accomplishment with mom's nursing home...I finally got fed up yesterday with the director of sw and/or nurses not getting back to me when I had a simple request or question (could someone look in mom's ears?)..that took two weeks; hoe often is mom's bp taken...still don't have an answer and the coup de grace, she wss supposed to be seen by the dentist, she was on the list, but not seen, that after I made 12 phone calls in two days to alert everyone who needed to know. So I callrd yesterday and told them nicely that from now on, I'm only doing email.
While making dinner, I could not find items I use regularly. Those you who are married understand that we, the women put things away that allows us to make dinner easier for us while hubby puts thing away very differently.
My accomplishment is that I cleared out an awkward cupboard filled with tupperware and other plastic containers we never use. This cupboard is useless as when you open it...it goes back about to a depth of say 18 inches,,,then it turns to the left going back another 2 feet. How do you use a cupboard like this? Anyway, I threw out all the plastic ware we never use so I can utilize it for more functional kitchen items for cooking. I will get a P-gun to label to the inside with Sharynmaries's kitchen items. If hubby continues to store things here, I will tell him I am throwing it out.
had to narc my renter girl out to probation tonight. she was lying in the floor unable to stand up . i really dont want to burn to death in the basement of my own home plus lose everything ive worked for for 55 years. id rather shed stare at block walls till she decides to change her life . ive always drank but not to the point of falling around. im not having this s**t ..
My failure was not going by my instincts (pull them all and get dentures) instead of being talked into "saving what we can". Now were almost a 5,000 already, and the ones we were trying to save, have caused the most pain and wasted time,effort and money.
My Accomplishment is INSISTING the dentist give me emergency pain pills, since the problems usually happen on the weekend.
Lesson learned....go with my gut, it's always right.
Tonight I managed to change my father's catheter clip and it was no big deal... I'd previously been trying to get him to do it, the nurses have shown him how to do it a few times, but he's simply not going to, he doesn't seem to have the ability/skill to pay attention to his care much at all, for whatever reason. So even though I knew it needed to be done once a week, I was just resisting doing it myself because it meant having my hands very near my father's manparts. Well, tonight I gave him a bowl of beef and noodles and while he sat on edge of his bed and ate it, I changed the clip like it was the most normal activity in the world. I'm a PRO now, I tell ya!
Failure:
Eh, probably just that I'm not being as productive as I'd like to be these days, spending lots of time on social media sites and watching videos on Internet. I think my father's super sedentary ways have rubbed off on me a little.
the treatment was sprung on me unexpectedly , then worked in a matter of days , now only 3 weeks left -- who wouldnt be flipping out ?
hepc is a m - f . its all about fatigue . i dont need fatigue , got things to do ..
10am and already a failure for me. Got upset with Mom because she told me all day yesterday that she had changed her incontinence pad every time I asked her - yet when I changed the trash bag this morning in the bathroom, it was empty. At one point yesterday, her pad was so soaked it literally fell out of her undies and slid down her leg onto the floor - I came out of my room after folding laundry and found her holding in her hand, trying to hide it. (sigh)
I didn't get upset in the sense that I was yelling or anything, but I did sit down and remind her (again) that she needs to change her pad frequently, or everything in the house smells like urine. She got all defensive and swore up and down that she changed it several times yesterday - I brought her the trash bag and showed her that she hadn't. She looked very confused and said she thought she had changed it. Then I showed her the protective pad from her chair that had a large stain on it from her sitting on it. So, she went and changed it (I checked the trash) and then laid down without showering, in her smelly nightgown. Argh!
I am trying so hard to let her retain some of her independence and not take over every aspect of her life, but darn it....this stinks.
We moved onto this forgoten dead end road a couple of years ago off a fancy estate but now it has been discovered and a buiding frenzy has erupted. The lots are wooded 5 acres and quite steep but for the last few days 18 wheelers have been rumbling past hauling dirt to level a lot. people want level lawns and a landscaping service!!!!!!!!! I like my rocks
When someone is making fun of us, it's hard to remember that witnesses/observers are most unlikely to agree with that someone. But it's true.
Still bloody annoying to have an enjoyable conversation brought to an abrupt end, of course, but better annoying than hurtful.
And maybe cut back her outing rations, especially when you have something better to do? Not to hurt or punish her, but why make the sacrifice if it isn't really necessary?
What would you do with this behavior? My mother is normally a nutcase but otherwise healthy. I am thinking: I can't change her. Being defensive or angry just makes her harder to deal with so standing up for myself becomes my own punishment. Adopting an attitude of apathy.
Any suggestions? Talking in a nice way doesn't work. I don't know if anything but ignoring her works for me. It's a no win every time. She does this more and more often because she can't hear or respond to people appropriately more and more.
She'll be 93 this week.
And all I said in response to all this was: "Mother. Use your frame."
Can I have my medal for not blowing up and lecturing her for the 6,258th time now, please?
Actually I will settle for a gin and tonic, which I am off to pour. Hope everyone's had a good day.
long story , about feeling so good i cant be held back , mixed with the nurses voices in my head telling me not to overdo it ..
I sat my butt on the deck in the 89* temperature for 1 1/2 hour and it felt sooooo good...
I deserved it after all the darn snow we had here in MA this winter, not to mention all the shoveling I did!
Accomplishment: Picked up the paint and supplies for the upcoming work on the house, contacted the city office and discussed the permits needed for possible extension of the deck and paving of the driveway (deck may not be possible, but driveway definitely is), and checked pricing on the varnish needed to refinish the wood floors in 2 rooms and a hall in the house - $200 on top of what I just spent for the paint and supplies, so that's going to have to wait another week or two.
Planned accomplishment for tonight: catch up on all this freakin' work so I can invoice my clients, which should have been done over the weekend!
what has a total of 60 feet and 20 teeth ? the front row of spectators at a molly hatchet concert..
i must have already died, im under the care of a total of 7 unbelievably hot looking women right now. that isnt even counting the receptionist . i play the dumbazz but i know theyre having as much fun as i am .. the indy va rocks !!
i suggest emails for all business. one can proof what theyre sending, and the business covered is indesputable later .
i had a great day . took edna for early morn , fasting blood test , then to see her SIL in a nearby town and still got 4 hours of wood cutting in . poured rain all day, it felt lovely on these dehydrated bones ..
often i cant tell you what day or even what month it is . who cares ? if its nice i work, if it rains the work shifts to the garage.
got busted on a surprise drug screen at va. couple of zans , couple of beers .
sue me , im not running for chief commander of nato , just kill the d*mn hepc. lol .. they were all nice about it and in fact werent all that surprised .. my punishment is biweekly visits with doc ly*on . bummer, shes hottern hammered hell ..
listening to a h*llish good alice concert and cooking edna some apples and rice..
lifes only going to get better , thats whats incredible..
family cookout for ednas 91 st b -day sat night. normally wouldnt be interested but wth ? ive got the firewood b**ches . lol
My accomplishment is that I cleared out an awkward cupboard filled with tupperware and other plastic containers we never use. This cupboard is useless as when you open it...it goes back about to a depth of say 18 inches,,,then it turns to the left going back another 2 feet. How do you use a cupboard like this? Anyway, I threw out all the plastic ware we never use so I can utilize it for more functional kitchen items for cooking. I will get a P-gun to label to the inside with Sharynmaries's kitchen items. If hubby continues to store things here, I will tell him I am throwing it out.