Emotional roller coasters of caregivers and the dysfunctional people they care for!

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I've been on an emotional roller coaster for weeks now since I returned to my home! My parents both with dementia were doing so much better when I left their plans were in place, help coming in doctors, on board. Now my dad has done an emotional 180 degrees, again hates his doctor moms doctor of which this is my fault according to him, on day then someone else's fault another. Mom is falling again 3 times in 2weeks, my father fell once that I knew about. Mom went back to the hospital, they did test of which still don't have results. I've been working with social worker from the hospital, Veterans hospital, both their doctors. Trying to get new help in for mom and dad since they believe the last women stole mothers wallet.

When mother got home from the hospital last night she fell again, her dementia is worse. Dads doctor won't let him drive but dad said he's going to drive anyway. The veterans mini van that dad hates to use isn't an option any longer. New government regulations state you have to be wheel chair bound. I TOLD HER NOW THAT'S JUST CRAZY TALK REALLY HE CAN'T HEAR!

All these years my parents haven't been re-enrolling in a medical plan so it's been defaulting to a lesser AARP complete plan which isn't very good but they've never known to reenroll. Now I'm going to have to conference in the insurance company and my father to reenroll them.

In order for my father to go into the veterans nursing home should he survive my mother he has to be 70% disabled he's 60%. So I called the doctor at the v/a of which won't speak to me and I get his very over worked secretary who tells me I'm the one not the doctor that has to contact the government to have my fathers disability rating changed. REALLY, THAT IS CRAZY TALK I TOLD HER!

So the agency that has been so wonderful to help me and my family, dad files a police report on them to get his 100.00 back sense they are bonded. (((((SCREAM)))))) they are kind enough to still try to help them after that. I ask day to please remove the complaint and drop the charges, he blew up on me SCREAMING ALL I CARE ABOUT IS HIS MONEY hello what are we talking about here, then he hangs up!

I called his neighbors today to check on them and when I told Hazel the is Zoolu, she said " Child how did you ever survive being raised by that man"? I said I don't know? About that time the new nurses aid came to their home. I called them later to check on them and they were just happy relieved, so glad to have the new gale! AND ME, WELL I FEEL LIKE DEATH WARMED OVER!

How was your day's Peep's

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Well my fathers obsessive continued verbally abused messages became to much after the 20th message. Calling me names insulting my character, he's very mentally ill, has been all his life! Dementia is just made him worse but this behavior I've seen before the dementia. I've had their # blocked so he can't upset me with further insults. I've know nothing wrong, long my job my insurance and life trying to help them both. All the agencies are put in place to help them I will not speak with them again, my father is toxic poison this is how I will remember him. I can conduct their business without him being involved. He's called the police, and attorney who my father said will prosecute me. I have full documentation of my dads mental state and any attorney that would take my father as a client should be disbarred. I called Adult Protective Services because a social worker told me to do so. APS said we can't help you maam your parents aren't in danger they're being well taken care of. I said please just make a note I called. They are on their own!
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Good on you Zoolife.... stop the abuse.... doing this in-home is bad enough, without having to do it long distance.... sorry it's all so overwhelming for you... but stick with your plans..... and then you will be able to relax a little with things being taken care of... it's going to be nightmare for awhile... but you survived your childhood.... you will do this because it's doing the right things for the right reasons...... so kudos to you for doing such a great job or raising yourself....!!!

And Jessie, you absolutely made my day..!!!!! I haven't laughed in days.... love the visual and you are right... we are our own style of zombies..... hugs...
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Ok new updated, the elder attorney suggested a trust set up under the family name to protect parents assets. My father went to the bank today after I explained to the bank what was going on several days ago, that I knew he'd be upset but to please reassure him this is his money and only set up to protect him. This morning I was going to try and get my life started calling TWC Texas Workforce to move forward in looking for a job, but was met with my fathers threats on my voice mail. He is now going try and sue the trust and have me put on jail! His neighbors have told him he needs to listen to me I'm trying to help them. His neighbors have said they have no idea how I survived my childhood, and they've never seen anything like him. I've called the trust attorney that set up the trust under the family name, I'm going to have to fly back there possibly to file for guardianship. My father can undo the POA, I can try to block him with a judgment. I will not that my fathers insulting calls any longer this is over the top crazy, with him it's not just the dementia he's always been this bad. My fathers neighbors say they're on my side. I'm going to tell my fathers sister I will no longer take his calls. I'm trying to find a way to block them on phone now! Any thoughts?
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Zoolife, we've been dealing with the local DAV for several years. Let me know how it goes.
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FloraSteele you are a life saver I will contact them tomorrow thanks you so much Bless you!
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JessieBelle, you are so funny and so right!!!! I have been looking a fright lately, on top of that I decided since I'm gong to be in the house the next week working on all this I'll give myself a mini chemical peel! LOL I do look frightful, we have to find our humor! I tell my friends after all this is over I'm getting insurance just so I can check into the pych ward!!!
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Zoolife, your day sounds normal to me. Now that is scary. I know what we should dress as on Halloween. Caregivers. I'm sure we look like zombies half the time and crazy people the other half, so we should be able to pull it off.
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Here is the website of the Disabled Veterans of America (DAV) organization. They are good at handling the paperwork for getting his disablilty rating raised, and other services. They never charge any money. http://www.dav.org/
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