My 94 year old mother is not incontinent but today (full moon issues) has forgotten how to use the bathroom. I walked her through the mechanics but she doesn't understand that she has to make herself urinate or defecate. She wants to go to the toilet every few minutes and is now wanting to find the "right one" that pulls it out of her. Any ideas? When is it appropriate to begin using Depends?

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I think you are way past depends.

Thanks, PirateGal. My husband is picking some up on his way home now. My mom has dementia but has never been incontinent so I was afraid to start using them but I don't want to take her to the bathroom every 10 minutes to take her through the entire process each time for no reason. I think she just may have some normal gas but in her mind, that means she has to go to the bathroom. Although she has not been incontinent, when she sits down, she will urinate without even realizing it and I have told her that she did. She had no idea how to use the paper. The last time we were in there, she had done nothing but said she was done as soon as she sat down.

Given that this is happening today and the full moon is tomorrow - I know some folks don't believe that but we have it on record - she could be fine and back to normal quickly. In a case like that, how do I explain the Depends? I mentioned adult diapers to her and she was agreeable but she really has no idea what I'm talking about.

I would start with depends now. They are not so bad, they are like panties but made with a absorptive material. I think you may save yourself a lot of cleaning up if you go ahead and use one. You can always put one on and then regular panty over it. I would think about stool softeners or laxatives (metamucil etc) so they won't have constipation issues which can be a nightmarish experience for both of you.

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