...or is that an oxymoron? This weekend was IT for me. Since attempting to be my father's caregiver, my life took a downward spiral... FAST.
My relationship (if there still is one) is on the rocks. I'm COMPLETELY exhausted. The once, happy-go-lucky, fit, positive person I once was has been replaced by a mean, negative miserable bitter woman. I don't even like myself. I'm moody and needy and just not fun to be around. This HAS to stop.
So... I had Daddy in a IL facility AND Adult Day care. That was ridiculously expensive, especially because Daddy never took advantage of the amenities of the IL. He stayed quarantined in his apartment... it just didn't make good financial sense.
About two months ago, he started whining about not wanting to be alone at night. I thought being in an IL facility would fix this since he still had people around him in the building. No... he wants someone in the room with him to annoy (ooops, I mean talk to) as he paces the floor... all night long.
So... being the good daughter I found someone to spend Monday through Thursday nights with him, but it was expensive and she was a bit greedy. I now have a new person on duty, but she's already asking for more money.
Here's the thing... we can't AFFORD the going price for overnight care. If Daddy needed lots of care, I could see it, but he just wants companionship at night (I could say SO much about how his life choices have placed him in this situation... yet I digress).
I was attempting to do the overnight shift on the weekends, but it has been a nightmare. Considering that's the only time my BF (he may be an ex now... not sure) and I would have to spend ALONE together, its taken its toll on the relationship and now I'M MAD!!!!!!!!!
What other alternatives do I have? I decided this past weekend that I will NOT do this anymore.
Any suggestions where I could locate reasonable, HONEST, decent overnight companionship for a grumpy old insomniac?