
I’m wondering if it would be helpful to have a “Topic” going for us Only Children? Moving forward with our elderly LOs we are caregivers for, (or just dealing with). Of course it wouldn’t be exclusive for onlies!
I understand that usually it’s only one child shouldering the workload, regardless of how many siblings, but still. Venting not frowned upon! Thank you ❤️
I remember talking to my Dad, saying how exhausting this was, that they needed (could afford) a caregiver to help out. Nope, nada, never, my Mom wouldn't have any part of having a stranger in the house... (sigh).
I had conversations on how their own parents had so many family members living around them. If my Dad's mother (lived out-of-State) needed help with something there were 15 people (all lived close by her) she could call upon (sons, their wives, numerous grown grandchildren). Similar with my Mom's parents (lived out-of-State family nearby).
At one time my Dad asked for me to retire from a long career (had to break many a glass ceiling). I answered if he had to quit to take care of his own parents. He understood and never asked me again.
Eventually I learn from other's here on AgingCare to learn to say the phase "I can't possibly do that" which usually was met with stares like my hair was on fire. Had to stand my ground, it wasn't easy as I found myself for the first time yelling at my parents as I was so frustrated, Mom was so very stubborn.
Once my Mom passed (98 yrs old), elder care was easier as Dad (95) was a sweetheart. He asked for around the clock caregivers, which he hired with my help (used an Agency). Later he said it was time to sell their house, and he moved into a wonderful senior facility which he enjoyed. Lot of lessons learned on this journey.
I am learning how to navigate this site, and appreciate your stories and suggestions.
Time to do my profile, for sure, and soon 😊
Yes, an ongoing discussion thread
about onlies (or whoever wishes to join in), is a better idea.
Im still learning about responding to each individual who replies to my Questions! And usually, I’m not too bad with “tech”…although I guess this is considered a Social Media platform? Now I’m NOT particularly familiar with that. Live and Learn!
And until I get it together a bit more, please know how REALLY wonderful it is to hear from you all. I’m so happy to have found this community ❤️
(I too just peruse the Questions and replies, in a somewhat random fashion :-)
Supporting my sib as our dad was dying and through the literal years of legal mess afterwards was like walking on a tightrope in a windstorm. And sib and I love each other and didn’t even have any major differences of opinion.
As my mom’s only I have all the responsibility of course but also all freedom. What I say goes and nobody can argue or try to guilt trip me. It’s comparatively pretty nice.
The admins don't clutter the site with more options I think simply because the topics are endless.
Think your idea of a sort of "long lived thread" for onlies and their unique problems is a good one, and likely best for "Discussions", the section on AC below "Questions". You could call it anything you wanted. For instance "What is unique for you as an ONLY". I was an onlie in helping usher out my much beloved bro. Thankful for no disagreeing sibling to be sure. He and I were two-together when our parents were passing, and so blessed to have had the support of one another.
Wherever we all fall on these conundrums, there we are.
And whatever questions come of it all, there THEY are, and again I am thinking it doesn't matter what topic they are posted under. But that's just me.
Want for certain to welcome you to the Forum, and we love you sharing your ideas.