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I wanted to share a solution that has really worked well for us. My mother has Alzheimer's that is fairly advanced. Here is a solution that has worked so very well for us (so far).

She is in Adult Day Care 5 days a week. We have the center pick her up each day and bring her home each day. I get notes from the center telling me about her participation, her disposition, her diet and her mood. She is taken care of by a good staff as well as RN's. This center is located in a hospital!

It is not cheap but it is her money and it's important to us that she has some quality of life while she can. She feels that she is going to work every day, having them pick up and bring home has given her a sense of independence. Sometimes her stories are so funny and one day she announced that she got a promotion. LOL

All the clients attending this day center feel they are going to work. Apparently that is quite typical, I am able to have time to work or do whatever I need to do and she has a life outside of me. This is an inter-generational day center so they get time with children each day, they have exercise and daily activities. They have coffee and muffins for breakfast and a full main meal for lunch.

Mom is exhausted when she comes home, usually in bed by 7:00 and even though she sundowns every day it just isn't that difficult to deal with because she is so tired.

This is such a perfect solution for us!!!

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I too endorse the use of adult day health programs (as they are officially called). They are not all created equal. We used one that was just adequate and one that was outstanding. We used the outstanding one three years before my husband's dementia progressed to the point where he needed more one-on-one attention than they could provide in a group setting.

It is good to have interaction with other adults besides the caregiver. It is good to have someone say, "Is that a new shirt? I like it!" It is good have programs about other client's vacations and hobbies. Grownups like show and tell, too!

Adult day programs are awesome and fill a growing need. They should be better known and understood, and there should be more of them!
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What makes a VA eligable. My husband w/mild dementia was in Korean war 3 yrs.?
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We had my mom in adult day care also. It's a great place. They kept her active and entertained. The ones here are based on a sliding scale fee so my dad only paid $8 an hour for her to be there. I truly believe it helped keep my dad sane and he still goes to visit the workers even though my mom is in a nursing home now. Just do a search for adult day programs in your area. The one we used is in a senior center but they also have them in some nursing homes.
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How do you find Adult Day Care? We live in a remote area and it's hard to find anyone willing to go all the way to mom's house. I will look this up on line. Thank you very much for this suggestion. My mom needs friends... as do I. The aging process is very isolating.
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I am looking forward to joining an adult day care for my wife ,she is early dementia.
We can share thoughts/stories of her experiences,as a veteran I'm told the fees are waived,begining Oct.1st.Although only appx.$12 hr.for varied schedule? I will look into the transportation also for reasons given.....Flexibility doing this myself.
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