The hard part is over.
I'm matching you with one of our specialists who will be calling you in the next few minutes.
I did that with my Dad when he got Dementia, and wanted out of the Nursing Home I had put him into when I could no longer take care of him.
I have had the talk with him 5 times now, being patient each time.
Then I made the hardest decision of my life; I decided to send him back to where his sisters, and nieces, and nephews were. 1500 miles from my Mother and myself. Knowing that it would be the last time I would hug him when he went to get on the plane; about killed me. But he was so happy about seeing his family. He moved with my Mom to be with her family.
Now he is very happy. He get's to see his great-grandchildren, and is doing better. I knew he would give up and die, if he stayed in the Nursing Home.
I made the choice. I do not regret it.
There are programs through DSS that can help. Find your local DSS and have them evaluate your home and Father. They will decide what they can help you with.
God Bless You and what you are doing. Good Luck.
My MIL had the same problem, as did my father several weeks ago. My MIL's memory continued to get worse. We told her she was visiting to allow her knee surgery to heal. To this day, she still says she's visiting and doesn't know any better as she has become almost totally nonverable and doesn't know who we are any more.
My father's favorite doctor, that he trusts more than anyone suggested it was just time. We could no longer provide the intensity of care he required and told us our health was beginning to suffer as caregivers. When and his doctor told him he needed all the care that they provided, he settled right in. He now has friends, enjoys the daily activities and has all the care he requires. After a period of adjustment, he is actually much happier now than he was at home, because he is around people his own age that he can talk to.
It's like sending your children off to college; they just need time to adjust.