Count Your Blessings and Lucky Stars!

BLESSINGS FOR TODAY: Hmm lets see......
Austin, Naus, mitzi, Jerome, Anne, lovingdaughter, hot water, my job, my son, my husband, Yes, oh yes the beautiful warm sunshine even tho I seldom see it or play in it. My wonderful veggie garden I tenderly planted and loving watered with the precious rain God sent I have been saving in buckets and barrels and large trash cans because yes this too will cease for a while in the hot months especially where I live, You know the ancients always look towards the sky how often do we do that. I used to when I lived in N.C. the sky there is so awesome. a little lower south there are so many trees, but I find the moon most every night I even saw a rainbow sunday coming home from evening service and it reminded me of the covenant that God made with Noah and for us all and everytime I see one I think that thought. So most importantly I am thankful that God is always here for me if I would just let him and get out of my own way.

Have a great day everyone. much love and affection to you all and If I missed anyone like Jerome and others you are included to because many times even if I haven't posted a response you have touched me and you all make me a better person.

Yes, Austin, it is. Thank God. It is shining very beautifully here, as well. (At least outside...)

Today the sun is shining-that is a blessing

I'm trying so hard to stay positive and "count my blessings," so some thoughts are better left unsaid... (Another day, another thread.)

Thanks for the Mother's Day wish, loving daughter. Mitzi, it is good to hear you thankful for the time you had with MIL. Neon, thanks for the washer reminder. And Naus, you are trying to stay thankful. I know each of you ladies have incredible hurdles to cross, but often encourage others. Jerome, too. How thankful and grateful we can all be for one another to lift each other up when we're down. Thanks for the brave fronts in the face of all you fellow caregivers do.

Mitzipinki, Anne, NAUSEATED,
When sad times come our way, it is difficult to think of the bright side of life. I try to think about the good times that have gone before and know that more are yet to come. We will always miss those who have gone before us, but we must look to the future. My dad died 4 years ago this August, and I miss him more each day. However, I am grateful to see that my daughter is happy and living her life to the fullest. Her father and I are both grateful that we will get to see her this summer as she lives halfway across he country. Hug your children and your loved ones.
To all of you, Happy Mothers' Day
Linda

Wow do I need to be back and especially in this thread. My husband lost his mother April 16th and it has been an especially hard death for me. It came totally unexpected. I had my aunt pass maybe a month prior to my MIL's passing, and I must find gratitude in the midst of all that has occurred.

First to those who missed me, THANK YOU! It is good to be missed. I am thankful that now with the unfortunate passing of my husband's mother, he may be developing a sense of appreciation. It is long overdue and greatly received although difficult to do.

I am grateful for the time I did have with my MIL. She taught me what being a real mother was all about (compared to my NPD mother). I learn to treasure the little things in life and realize that no matter how small a task I do for someone, it will impact their life some how, some way.

I am learning to appreciate technology all the more except learning at a new level. I am totally consumed, but grateful for the challenge because it will bring me to a higher level. :)

I am grateful for the friends I've never "seen" but I cry with them and laugh all too often. You guys/gals are my inspiration and touch my heart. Thank you for all you do even when it seems impossible.

God bless all of you (whether you believe or not) :)

Dear Austin, so sorry to hear about your day. How can a Social Worker order you about? I am thinking you need one on YOUR side. This is insane. Take care of you, honey. I am so glad you have a friend who listens and cares

I count my blessings- I had a day from hell and I count the blessing of a good friend who I was able to call and vent with about it-the husband who I was ordered by the social worker to go in to see for 1 hr. on 2 different days -told me he is thinking of getting a legal seperation-I said that is a good idea but I am not leaving the house and I count all of you who have been there for me this past year, who are so giving while going through their own problems and still take the precious time they have for themselves to encourage little ol me.

And Neon, I'm thankful for you! :)

this is wacky just like me wocky I am so thankful for my washer and dryer and my dishwasher.

Your Mom is so lucky to have you, Neon. Sounds like the dogs are, too. LOL Hope you get some rest from all your running. We're here for you. Things could be worse, so count your blessings. Talk with you after you're done working!

I don't like some circumstances and some of other people's actions. But I can't control the universe, only me, and that's only sometimes, LOL. It is only by the grace of God that anything goes well in my life. I thank him for his blessings today: sunshine, food, my cups of coffee, my wonderfully supportive husband and helpful son. My parents are still alive, and I get the opportunity to serve them. They can't help themselves too well, and I've been blessed, so far, with perfect health. So I thank God for my home, my friends, and this site, too. I'm sure I can think of more, and will write more later, because I want to look for blessings, rather than dwell on the negative today. I pray that God blesses all of you wonderful caregivers, as well. Though things may not be ideal, please go and have a wonderful day, by God's grace!

thank you Anne and everyone else, I need all the prayers I can get. I just ran home to let the poor dogs out poor things had their legs crossed, folded a load of jeans, put another load in the dryer started another load of laundry, emptied the dishwasher threw some food in a bag let the dogs back in and back at work all in less than 30 min. I can't even rely on her to let the dogs out or give them water or anything and she is perfectly capable ofdoing those things, she just stands around asking stupid questions why did the dog take off his choker Its too big he must not have liked it haha ITS TOO BIG well dogs are smarter than some humans AMEN he must not have liked that one ITS TOO BIG see what I have to work with now back to work LOL

Dear Neon, I'm glad you can vent, and have a place for it. You are loved and appreciated by many, as you have been an inspiration to us. Know we are praying for you, and this, too shall pass. You're not alone, because many of us struggle like that. I'm praying me counting my blessings will help my Mom see some of hers, as she struggles with being negative, as well. But I am going to focus on the positive, and thank God today the sun is shining. I'll pray he sends some sunshine to your heart and lift your spirits today. The Comforter is just waiting to do that for you. Know we're praying for you, dear. Take care. A

was a bad week end groping for inspiration and trying really hard to hold back the tears and drop the depression, mother is such a negative person and is never satified with anything I do although I am the only one that does anything.

Dear Mitzi and Neon, long time no chat. Hope all is well with you! I've missed reading your posts. Take care, ladies, and have a great day. Write if you can. Love to hear your blessings, as you have been such an inspiration and blessing to many. Thanks, A

Hello Kathy, sometimes we have rude awakenings. I feel like Chicken Little who is growing up. And, yes there are angel caregivers who've attained hero status while giving of themselves to others. We can lead and love by example, and pray for those who don't understand. It's personal choice, and you have chosen to be a loving, caring helper. Praying for your comfort, peace and rest. It is difficult at times, but there are many blessings as well. Just think, we are not blind anymore, and we can grow and learn in the process. We mature, and can then teach others. Give yourself a break, and accept some praise for doing the right thing. Even if your siblings "don't get it," you do, and will be rewarded accordingly, someday. So nice finally catch up and "talk" with you.

GOOD MORNING TO ALL. I HAVE READ SO MANY POSTS, AND MY EYES ARE OPENED FOR THE FIRST TIME IN MY LIFE. I HAVE BEEN LIVING IN A FANTASY WORLD FOR SO LONG. LIFE IS NOT THAT WAY, AND I AM NOW REALIZING THAT. THE STORIES ARE HARD FOR ME TO BELIEVE THAN HUMAN BEINGS CAN BE SO UNKIND, AND UNCARING. I SEE NOW, I HAVE AN EVEN LONGER ROAD AHEAD OF ME. I BELIEVE THAT I HAVE NOT EVEN BEGUN TO SEE WHAT I AM HEADED FOR IN REFERENCE TO MY SIBLINGS. GOD HAVE MERCY ON THEM, FOR THEY WILL ONE DAY HAVE TO ANSWER FOR THEIR ACTIONS. MAY YOU ALL HAVE THE BEST DAY THAT YOU CAN. GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU, FOR THERE ARE SO FEW OF US WHO ARE WILLING TO GIVE UP OUR LIVES, SANITY, AND HAPPINESS.
KATHY

Ladies and gentlemen, it is such a pleasure to hear your stories of hope and inspiration. Carol, thank you for sharing that wonderful story. We all need an attitude adjustment from time to time. I'm praying no one needs to be adjusted because of mine. When I get up in the morning, I want to smile at the loving husband God gave and who is so supportive of me and all I do. I want to hug and kiss my wonderful God-loaned eight year old son, who should be getting all my attention, but instead, is learning how to care for parents and grandparents. I pray he learns his lessons well.

I've concluded that life is all about relationships. Ours with our Maker, our parents whom God selected, our siblings, neighbors, and those in our path. How we treat each other does make a difference, even into eternity. We are servants, and how we touch the lives of others may make a difference we can't see today. Let's be an encouragement to someone today. May God bless you on your journey.

Anne's story was a real eye-opener. We all have problems, but our attitudes often need adjusting (at least mine does) as to how to view things. I had made a quick run to the bank awhile back, to deposit a check I badly needed. I have a son with many medical issues, and was thinking about that. Then, I stopped and waited while a school bus unloaded a tiny girl - in a wheel chair.

The lesson wasn't lost on me. After the elderly driver closed up the ramp, and slogged through the snow to go around the bus and get in, I followed, teary eyed, thinking wow, I needed that. This girl may not have my son's problems, but she and her family surely have a hard road to trudge. Not all problems are visible to others, but this little girl's major problem was there for all to see. She will be a blessing to many, I hope. I said a prayer to her family, adjusted my attitude and counted my many blessings as I drove on.
Carol

Peace2

Look at what you said honey, all the people have hurt you and let you down that is why you are cynical, so am I. I do not rely on anyone for my validation anymore because they are incapable of giving it. Its called the me syndrome. But.... God has not let you down he is always right there, talk to him, give over to him what you feel you can not deal with. He is your father he wants a relationship with you You cannot have that relationship if you don't talk to Him. He may not answer you at first but He will in His time. All fathers discipline their children especially when they love them and He Does Love You! and so do we We are all in this together that is why we formed this band of caregivers connection to help each other.

Just a quick note, I worked as a photographer this week end taking pictures of a mother daughter tea so I would not be lonely. My son was out of town with his inlaws and my mother no matter how I tried with cards and gifts chose to spend the day in her room. Will not go out to eat will not do anything normal people do and if yu say something toher its I've been sick or its all my fault so the only person I have to turn to is God. My husband is on the road all the time so no time there and when he is home he has his things to do for his job and nascar and that makes him happy Its a very boring and unhappy life for me as I am a people person so both being born in November and no offense to anyone else born in that month but ... those November people can just sit home by themselves I am going to find some way to go to the places I want even if it is alone.

It is so hard to live in this world when you want to be spiritual and on another thread Naus said you don't have to be spiritual sorry Naus, yes you do if you want your soul to go to heaven than you must be spirtual you must walk the same path as Jesus. I hope this has helped you Peace 2 and I hope this helps you find Peace to. Love Neon

Peace2, don't get angry at yourself. I think I saw MindingOurElders on another post who said it best "Three generations in a home happened a lot decades ago. But people didn't live on to be severely demented and create an abusive atmosphere for grandchildren (let alone the adult child - or in the case of Jamiea - adult grandchild and great-grandchildren). They died of some disease before that happened."

You are doing the best you can and do not worry about what others do. Each situation is unique. The beauty of how some of us have learned to rely on God is being right where we are at. God always meets us right where we are at. You don't have to "be" spiritual or "be" something you are not.

Again, don't be afraid of setting boundaries for yourself and those around you. It will help you find "you" again. We get so lost in providing for others that we do more damage to us and I truly believe that is why the statistics for caregivers dying first is so high.

Don't stop loving those you care for, but realize your limitations as well. Thank God for the agencies and people that do care and are now available to assist us in caring for our loved ones. God gave you a gift to care and it is one that is not easily learned or balanced. Do your best and hold your head high that you do it every day to the best of your ability.

Peace 2 there are so many here that are so knowable about faith and the word of God it is important to carry all our problems and cares to God I find the easiess place to pray is when I am out walking on our bike trail I feel closer to God when I am out among his trees and nature but others here are so good about what the Bible says but I know he cares about his people you will get your faith back just let others help you and you will get lots of help from the dear people here on this site- we all have problems and are glad to help so use this site and you will find in time you will be able to contribute to others peace of mind.

I ADMIRE AND ENVY ALL OF YOU THAT POSTED A COMMENT TO ANNE'S THREAD. I WILL SAY I AM THANKFUL THAT SO FAR I AM HEALTHY PHYSICALLY SO I CAN CONTINUE TO TAKE CARE OF BOTH MY PARENTS AND MY HUSBAND. I HAVE LOST THAT SPIRITUAL HOPE AND FAITH THAT YOU ALL SEEM TO HAVE. I KNOW HOW IMPORTANT IT IS TO HAVE IT, BUT I HAVE BEEN HURT SO MANY TIMES IN MY LIFE BY THE PEOPLE I LOVE THE MOST, AND NOW I TOOK THIS RESPONSIBILITY ON. YOUR RIGHT, I JUST CARED, AND WAS DOING, WHAT I THOUGHT WAS THE RIGHT THING. I GET ANGRY AT MYSELF WHEN I HEAR ABOUT PEOPLE THAT HAVE FAR LESS, AND WORSE OFF THAN ME, AND I DARE COMPLAIN. YOU ARE AMAZING, ALL OF YOU, MAYBE YOU CAN HELP ME GET THAT BACK. I HAVE BECOME HARD, AND CYNICLE. I AM NOT THE PERSON I ONCE WAS, AND I MISS HER SO MUCH. I REALLY LIKED HER. I DO NOT LIKE THE PERSON I HAVE BECOME, AN EMOTIONAL WRECK. I HAVE BEEN CALLED A MARTYR, AND NAMES SUCH AS THAT. I NEVER FELT I WAS THAT. I JUST CARE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IS THERE SOMETHING WRONG WITH THAT. GOD BLESS ALL OF YOU.

My blessing is all of you dear friends those who were there when I found this site and all of those who joined on through out the year you have made my life complete it is amazing with all your hardships you are able to give comfort to those who need nuturting at that time God bless you all and thank you for keeping me sane amd realizing I have power to change what needs to be changed for my good at times and that I do not have to be a doormat as in the past-I will write on my wall for my update.

Amazing Grace What a thread! To all you courageous caregivers out there:
Happy mothers day! Hugs to all. May GOD continue to bless you! Jerome.

That was beautiful! Thank you, Neon. May God bless you richly this Mother's Day!

SOMETHING TO SHARE WITH ALL OF YOU :

When I say... "I am a Christian", I'm not shouting, "I'm clean living," I'm whispering, "I was lost. Now I'm found and forgiven"

When I say... "I am a Christian" I don't speak of this with pride, I'm confessing that I stumble and need Christ to be my guide.

When I say... "I am a Christian" I'm not trying to be strong. I'm professing that I'm weak and need His strength to carry on.

When I say... I am a Christian" I'm not bragging of success, I'm admitting I have failed and need God to clean my mess."

When I say... " I am a Christian" I'm not claiming to be perfect, My flaws are far too visible, But God believes I'm worth it.

To all of you who are caregivers, Happy (Mothers = Caregivers Day) to you. May God watch over and protect you and yours and may your hearts be open to receive all the blessings God has in store for you.

Thank you Neon. I'm glad you have a passion, which is a blessing to many, no doubt. I am praying it is a good Mother's Day for you and your Mom, no matter how you choose to celebrate.

I just got a call about a possible home for my Mom's beloved dog, Angel. I called the lady who is willing and enthusiastic. She lives down near Mom's current home, with no children, so is willing to adopt Angel to be her "baby." She works for an Assisted Living Facility, and has already obtained permission to take Angel alone to work with her every day. Sounds like a perfect for our almost everyone! Now that's a blessing! (Thank you, Lord!) When we drive down to Mom's we'll meet with this lady and her husband tomorrow night. She's eager and excited. We're praying that Mom will take this well. So God is always right on time...and that is a blessing, as well.

thats fabulous Anne, so happy for you and your sister and your Mom , It will go well. I had to find something to do for Mothers day so I am taking pictures of the mother daughter tea that will take place Sat from 9 to 1 to benefit the harmony house for abused children. Thats my passion so volunteer, volunteer and volunteer some more, thats what I do best. I will however, give my mother a card with a few dollars in it, If I buy something she will just put it down and not putting myselft thru that. My son is with his inlaws so thats the way the cookie crumbles he did call me today to ask me if I wanted to go and I said well when the subject was brought up I was told I could go but I would have to get my own place and I don't have the money so found something to do and told him he said they had rented a cottage and I could have went with them I said well, I am a planner not a last minute person and if that was the case why wasn't I told last week when i brought the subject up. But I am committed now so have fun. see ya when you get back.

you all have a good mothers day

I just got a blessing. My sister is driving from Illinois to lower Michigan to help move our Mother to Northern Michigan this weekend. She'll get to see Dad, who she last saw on Thanksgiving (declining and confined with Advanced Stage Alzheimer's). My sis and Mom will get to see Mom's new apartment for the first time, and we'll be able to bless her for a unique Mother's Day. I pray all goes well...