I used to think I was the "strong" one in the family. Everyone always turned to me in times of need because I could always hold it together. I can't anymore. It's only been about 6 weeks of caring for my Dad and I am completely at my wit's end.
The resentment and guilt (all magnified by this situation) are almost too much to bear.
I'm approaching the third anniversary of my baby brother's suicide, my BF and I are taking a "break" as a result of this fiasco and I just feel alone. I'm gaining weight because I don't have the time or energy to prepare the foods I usually eat, so I suffer through the horrible greasy cafeteria food Dad likes (or he refuses to eat). I'm EXHAUSTED.
I think I have the flu but can't afford to be out of work, so through my aching body and aching heart, I'm completely done. I can't stop crying... I'm completely miserable.
I miss the days when I would wake up at 5 am to go to the gym or jog. I miss hiking on weekends or just lounging around with my BF watching redbox.
The longer this goes on the more I really don't like my dad. HELP!!!