I am the caregiver for my biological mother (I was raised by my grandparents).My husband assists me in caring for my bio-mother. After many years of estrangement, we have already cared for my bio-father who died of cancer in 2012. I was out of state for 6 months and separated from my husband until my bio-father's death.
Now, we have moved my bio-mother to our state to be near to us. She is living in her own apartment at a senior apartment complex, but I handle all of her affairs, as she is illiterate and does not speak English well.

Now, the real "mother" has Parkinson's and lately had a bad spell where she had no energy and was not feeling well, so she called me. Immediately, I figured out her issues by phone and advised her on what to do while my husband and I proceeded to contact doctors for appointments, etc.
While calling the doctors, my husband was calling my mother to keep her updated. During a phone call,another woman got on the phone and told my husband she was a RN at the facility(which is NOT a medical facility)and proceeded to tell my husband that we were not doing enough,that we needed to take the situation more seriously, and be more aggressive with the doctors re the care of my mother.
My husband and I,after making doctors appointments,etc.went over to my mother's complex and found out that it was one of the other residents that had gotten on my mother's phone & had spoken to my husband.We asked her to join us in a private room,so we could speak with her. We told her we appreciated her concern for my mother,but were upset with her interference and what she had said. She did not apologize and said fine,left, and proceeded to file a complaint with management and is now wanting a meeting between our families and the apartment management.

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I would not feel like I have the right to tell another resident's family what they should be doing with the care of a family member, so thus I feel that they have no right to do that to me.

Actually, this woman is just another resident living at the facility and has nothing to do with the care of my mother. Her complaint to management is that I asked her to come into the private room so that I could talk to her about what she had said to my husband over the phone. According to her, I treated her like a child. When we walking to the room, my husband heard her say "my big mouth got me in trouble again." Now she is telling everyone that she did not say what she said and that my husband and me are in the wrong for speaking with her and asking her not to interfere again.So,now along with balancing everything ie doctors appointments, medical equipment, we have to have a meeting to try to resolve this issue. Just another unneeded stress.Thanks for "listening..."

Is this "other woman" providing any care to your mom, unbeknownst to you? What exactly is her complaint to management? Is it that someone as disabled as you mom shouldn't be living there? Remember that there are protections in the US against discrimination against people with disabilities.

Perhaps this woman is well meaning, or perhaps she's crazy. Do keep us updated. It sounds as though you are doing all you can.

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