I have been caring for my mom that lives with Alzheimer's for 18 months. This began when her husband had to be hospitalized then rehab followed for several months. When this first occurred my siblings wanted to pay me for being with mom, but I said no, let's wait to see what happens. Well here we are, I am still here, caring for both of them with over $20,000.00 in expenses out of pocket for mom alone, to say nothing of no payment for this task.
We have just started to work through the process of trying to determine what mom owes me, she planned well for her retirement, and what I should be paid. But is has gotten really ugly, in fact my brother and sister requested an investigation by Adult Protection Services in our area, not just one, but two, one for my mom the other for her husband. I haven't done anything to raise this sort of issue. I am in the process of obtaining letters from neighbors and medical care providers to document my excellent care for them. I don't even know what the accusations are yet, but am still absolutely flaberghasted by them taking this sort of action. All over money, and paying me what this service is worth, it is definitely a 24/7 job which they have done little to assist. Their concern is that the share and share alike clause will change because of payment to me for service. But share and share alike has more than on connotation, not just the benefit after death, but also the responsibility when care is needed.