You know how woman "forget" how bad labor pain is, like we are programmed to, so that life can go on? Well it's day 5 of Mom being home and it feels like I'm in labor!!!!
It's been a tough week and I am sick, which sure doesn't help. We had a long hard night in the ER last night and I am thinking......WHAT WAS I THINKING!!!! Oh well.....life goes on.
There wasn't nothing in the text, just a pic of mom and I.
Please check in a bit more often.
I'm glad my comparison sparked so many different points of view!
I will try hard to always remember to take care of myself as well as my Mom. I will also always try to remember that we don't always appreciate what we have until it's gone. It's very late here, and I'm a little out of it from my cold meds, so I hope I am making sense.
Got the pic J but lost the text when I pushed the wrong button in the dark. Miss and love you. We will chat tomorrow. Night all!
Maybe glum was the wrong description.... I feel negative. Very very negative. Not towards my mother, just towards others out there.
Thus, I don't see the sting of death as having the final word and thus can face the death of a loved one and myself with hope. Otherwise, all I'm left with is fatalism if the only hope I have is in this life and world.
Childbirth gives you life/joy and hope, caregiving gives inevitable death.
I am so GLUM! Sorry!!
Welcome back love!
The first time, her mother intruded into the situation with unsolicited and unwanted advice right at transition. In the morning, her mother really stole her joy as a young mother with her cruel comments about having a flat tummy after giving birth to twins.
Well, in caregiving as in labor you can run into people who intrusively offer their unsolicited and unwanted advice right at the very worse time. And following labor as in caregiving, some people can be painfully judgmental.
The experience with the second child was different. Her labor kept trying to kick in far too early. When it was safe to go into labor full speed ahead, it was determined that a c-section was needed because our son was too big. BTW, we did not have her mother or father around during this labor and birth experience in light of what happened earlier plus other ugly things her mom did following the birth of the first child.
Well just like not all labor experiences are exactly the same, neither are all caregiving experiences. Just like in labor sometimes the unexpected is called for in giving birth, likewise in caregiving sometimes the means of delivering caregiving for the person being cared for changes from what we planned to what we really need to a have happen for everyone's well being. Similarly, in some labor and birth circumstances there is a need for boundaries, in caregiving there is a need for boundaries.
That's about all the comparison that I can see from my observations of mywif'e's experiences of labor with each child.
Other than that, I'll conclude with this.
Labor in childbirth is extremely short compared to the labor in caregiving.
Labor in childbirth anticipates a new life.
Labor in caregiving anticipates a new life beyond life on earth.
The pain of labor in childbirth is sometimes lessened by medical means.
The pain of caregiving is sometimes lessened by medical means. Caregivers sometimes needs antidepressants or anti-anxiety meds.
What you just said........... which I've heard from many before you......... and feel myself about loved ones I have already lost........ Says it all. What did Joni Mitchell say? They paved paradise... Thank you for posting just what I needed to be reminded of right now. See? THAT'S why I love this safe place.
in hindsight she died from old age and poor health . when her digestive system ceased its rumbling she had only 3 or so days to live , two of those k - o 'd on morphine / ativan .
i didnt have a bedfast parent or incontinence to cope with , just a steaming case of bipolar , schitzoaffective disorder , OCD and terminal dementia .
bent my head to its limits ..