My mother who is living independently in her own home with no obvious signs of dementia, refuses to make decisions regarding her present and future care. She has COPD and on oxygen with difficulty walking to far. I live an hours drive and work. She refuses to consider hiring outside help or using any form of public transportation even those that provide for the elderly and handicapped. My sister and I cannot always be available all the time to take her shopping and her never ending doctors appointments we have to work. She refuses to move closer or into a more senior friendly place. She relies on the next door neighbor to mow her lawn and shovel her driveway for which she does pay for, but the neighbor works and is not always available. I do have DPOA, but she is still considered competent by her doctors. I see she is slowly declining and wants to be a recluse and watch TV all day. She would so much benefit living in a senior community or assisted living. I have cannot make last minute changes to my work schedule if she needs to see a doctor immediately. Her neediness and inconsideration is a major stress in my life. It would be so much easier if she was willing to compromise in some of her care, but it is all or nothing with her. I live in fear each day for when the ball will drop and I will have to make decisions for her that she will not like. My sister in a contingent on the DPOA. I am seriously thinking of resigning as primary DPOA. Fed up with her living with her head stuck in the sand thinking she can continue living as she is until she dies.