Caregiver wages/ Parents estate.

Follow
Share

My dad has been living with me for 9 years. We have never been paid a dime for taking care of him and he has alzheimers for the past two years. We pay for some of his expenses out of our own money such as cable and water and gas to get all his groceries. can we come back to the estate after his passing and get paid for all that we did to help him live a peaceful and happy life. My wife and I both work and have given up a great deal of our lives and time to take care of my dad and no family members help us at all. They complain and moan about where the money is and the POA complains if we ask for money to pay for dads items. We love our dad and want the best for him and to make him comfortable but we do feel that other siblings should not be entitled to the money at the end. We cannot use the funds to put him in AL as the POA won't authorize it and the POA will also not pay for a caregiver to come in during the days we work to help dad bathe and eat and get his meds. We just want to know if anyone has ever heard of the estate being sued by the caregiver and if the caregiver has a right to any of the funds.

This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Find Care & Housing
30

Comments

Show:
1 2 3
I agree that it might make a difference if some form of care services contract were in place between the sisters; but I'd be astonished if that were the case. It sounds a lot more as if younger caregiver sister is segueing from groundless optimism to increasing anxiety about what is to become of her in the future. Her choice is to speak up now, or to throw herself on the good graces of a nephew who probably has no clue about her financial situation - and why should he have?

It's not an easy conversation to initiate. But she'd better.
(1)
Report

Certain types of creditors may lien property for failure to pay. These include tradesmen and financial companies. The ability to lien real property is I believe prescribed by law, which also establishes the foundation for lienability, requirement notices, perfection of lien, etc.

I honestly don't know, w/o doing some extensive legal research, whether a caregiver lien could be filed, but certainly not without a foundation agreement addressing breach of contract.

Another issue would be whether the contract was oral or written, terms of payment, breach of contract issues and remediation, and more.

I'm not necessarily disagreeing with CM, who always gives wise advice, but rather stating that this could be a complex issue. But CM does raise some important issues, and that's the relationship between the two, and what will happen to the caregiving sister after the other sister dies.

There may be some way to include a provision in the will that the caregiving sister has a choice of remaining in the home so she doesn't become homeless, which would be a tragedy after caring for her sister for years.
(2)
Report

No. Younger sister needs to have an honest conversation with home-owner sister about what home-owner sister wants to happen to her property after her death. And meanwhile, if younger sister is suffering financial loss as a direct result of caregiving commitment, there needs to be an honest conversation about that, too.

So. Assuming home owner sister is of sound mind, she can do as she pleases with her property and is by no means obliged to leave her estate to her son. Does she understand and appreciate what position she is leaving her caregiver sister in? Does she recognise caregiver sister's efforts financially in any way?
(2)
Report

Home owner is 75, and confined to a wheelchair. Her live in sister is her 24/7 caregiver. Both sisters smoke and have heart problems but otherwise are in reasonable health.
Home has been willed to her only son who is well off and lives across the country.
Can younger sister put lien on property for caregiver services?
(0)
Report

Home owner is 75, confined to a wheelchair. Her sister is 71 and lives with her and is her 24/7 caregiver. Both sisters smoke and have heart problems but otherwise in reasonable health. Elder sister has willed the home to her only son. Son is well off and lives across the country. Can caregiver put lien on property for services?
(0)
Report

Sorry I meant save it.
(0)
Report

Call in adult protective services. Even if your dad has Alzheimer's that does not mean someone else needs to handle his money, especially if they will not pay added expenses such as a caregiver to come in and take care of him during the day, or to put him in Assisted Living. This is his money not theirs and it should be going totally for his care, instead of someone trying to say it for his other heirs or himself. This is ludicrious. Call them, he might qualify for Medicaid if he does not have that much money and a daily provider. If he has enough money then it should be used for Assisted Living and his care. This POA is not doing the right thing for your dad. Call in Adult Protective Services now, and don't be taken advantage of.
(0)
Report

What a giant pain in the butt... I agree with all responses.. You need to get your Dad to change the POA to you, or if your Uncle wants he can take care of your Dad...

After reading this post, I am so happy that my Mom 91yrs. has me listed as her MPOA and financial POA, she been with me for 12yrs. and I would have let the one in control take over a long time ago...
(0)
Report

I took care of my aunts boyfriend after she died for about a year while he battled cancer. we sat through every radiation and chemo appt together and I drove him to every doctors appt. also took him out of the area for treatment. No one in his family helped. When he was in hospice he gave me his car and some savings bonds for my children. We never transfered these items and as soon as he passed his brothers took everything from me. Can I sue the estate for being his care giver? I never met the oldest brother until my "uncle" was in hospice, made me crazy that they didn't care.
(0)
Report

A POA does not automatically make the POA executor of anyone's estate! Executor is only named in a Will and if your dad is now suffering with Alzheimer's, any Will made now that leaves you/your wife anything is subject to challenge by the other "beneficiaries" after he passes away. I'm in the middle of lawsuit myself with a paid caregiver who got a POA and walked away with everything my dad owned! I've won every step of the way but its been a long battle and I've had to do without an attorney because the estate is so small. My advice....file an action in your local superior court asking for the current POA to be revoked and to have yourself appointed conservator for your dad. You will have to report to the court on a regular basis as to what's going on, how you spend his money, etc. and as conservator, you can ask the court to permit you to hire a caregiver, that is paid with dad's funds. Also, if your Dad is receiving Medicare and/or has little or no money, try and find an "IHSS" program - in home health services, in your area that actually pays the caregiver. Income requirements are tight but most states have these programs in order to keep patients at home rather than in long-term care or hospitals. You can then hire whoever you want but they are paid by IHSS..it's funded by federal, state and local $$$. Good luck and stay strong!
(1)
Report

1 2 3
This discussion has been closed for comment. Start a New Discussion.
Related
Questions