In order for me to have time out I have to pay someone to watch her. Her family is not very forth coming in this area and I understand one works a lot and the other is 70 years old. I get a reprieve about once a week for about 4 or 5 hrs. I feel myself getting a little claustrophobic and need more than that, even if I'm still here, but have the feeling of coming and going when I please. I know if I paid someone which is hard to find for a whole day, it's a big chunk out of my check and it can only be specified amount of hrs. I still think back on the 3 years I have lived with her before her illness how I was able to go to school and the only requirement was to keep her home clean and to be home at night. I am grateful for all this and I shouldn't complain. But I would just love to have one whole 24 hour day off once a week. I'm just venting but I do pray to God to give me patience and tolerance because someday she wont be here anymore. I don't complain to much to the family for fear they will stick her in a nursing home where she can't have her dog and I know she wont last. Again I am also grateful to the state for making it possible to get paid to take care of her. Maybe by writing this I may have made myself feel better.