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B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 1 · 2023-06-22T12:32:14.000-0400

🤓🤓

"I hate when you have to
BE NICE
to someone you really want to throw a brick at."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 2 · 2023-06-22T12:31:41.000-0400

🤓🤓

"Note to self:
It is illegal to stab people for being stupid."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 3 · 2023-06-22T11:04:20.000-0400

😊

MEN struation
MEN opause
MEN tal breakdowns

See? Most of women's problems begin with MEN.

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 4 · 2023-06-22T10:57:12.000-0400

😊😊😘😘

How to win an argument:

1. Be a woman
2. That's it
3. You win
4. Congratulations

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 5 · 2023-06-22T10:01:50.000-0400

😊😊😇😇

Have you ever had one of those days,
when you're holding a stick
and everybody looks like a piñata?

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 6 · 2023-06-22T07:40:55.000-0400

😊😊

"Don't steal, don't lie, don't cheat...
The government hates competition."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 7 · 2023-06-22T07:35:30.000-0400

🤯

"Sometimes getting out of bed
just ruins the whole day."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 8 · 2023-06-22T06:33:24.000-0400

😊😊

Hi,
I'm your brain. Do you hate this song? Yes?
Well, I don't care,
because I've memorized it and we'll be singing it
all day.

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 9 · 2023-06-22T05:36:03.000-0400

😉

"Today, 2 year-olds can unlock an iphone,
open and close their favorite apps all by themselves.
When I was that age, I was eating dirt."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 10 · 2023-06-22T05:34:42.000-0400

😊

"DO NOT TOUCH"

Must be one of the scariest things to read on Braille...

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 11 · 2023-06-22T04:09:40.000-0400

😊😊

"The irony of all this is,
the internet was created to save us time."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 12 · 2023-06-22T01:42:45.000-0400

😉

"That awkward moment
when you leave a shop without buying anything
and all you can think is, 'Act natural,
you're innocent.'"

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 13 · 2023-06-22T01:35:00.000-0400

😉

"That awkward moment
when you sneeze, and no one says bless you."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 14 · 2023-06-22T01:33:25.000-0400

😉

"That awkward moment
when Microsoft Word
informs you your name is spelt wrong."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 15 · 2023-06-22T00:41:35.000-0400

😉

"That awkward moment
between birth and death."

B bundleofjoy Jun 22, 2023 · Answer 16 · 2023-06-22T00:40:15.000-0400

😉

Hyphenated.
Non-hyphenated.
The irony.

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 17 · 2023-06-21T16:24:54.000-0400

😉

"Make sure your worst enemy
is not living between your own two ears."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 18 · 2023-06-21T15:21:27.000-0400

❤️

"I don't know why everybody hates lazy people,
we didn't even do anything."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 19 · 2023-06-21T14:21:06.000-0400

🤯

"Congrats!!!
You've unlocked the next level of stupid."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 20 · 2023-06-21T13:22:06.000-0400

🙂🙂

"Never underestimate the stupidity
of idiots."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 21 · 2023-06-21T13:19:56.000-0400

😘

"I hate it when you offer someone
a sincere compliment
on their mustache
and suddenly...

She's not your friend anymore."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 22 · 2023-06-21T13:17:43.000-0400

😘

"As I do more laundry,
nudists seem less crazy."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 23 · 2023-06-21T10:36:24.000-0400

😇😘

"He said there was no spark between us anymore.
So I tasered him!!!
I'll ask him again when he wakes up."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 24 · 2023-06-21T09:38:36.000-0400

🤯 murphy's law...

"If you know something will go wrong
and you do everything possible to stop it from happening,
then something else will go wrong."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 25 · 2023-06-21T06:27:21.000-0400

🙂🙂

"Mood:
wanna sleep for 3 years."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 26 · 2023-06-21T05:29:00.000-0400

😉

"I'm sorry we fought.
I hate it when
you're wrong."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 27 · 2023-06-21T05:03:43.000-0400

😉

"That awkward moment
when someone you hate
is breathing."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 28 · 2023-06-21T04:12:55.000-0400

😇

"I can admit when
you're wrong."

B bundleofjoy Jun 21, 2023 · Answer 29 · 2023-06-21T02:34:30.000-0400

🙂🙂

"My perfect morning:
I wake up, get out of bed,
get into a bigger,
warmer bed with no
alarm clock and
instantly fall asleep."

B bundleofjoy Jun 20, 2023 · Answer 30 · 2023-06-20T18:13:40.000-0400

🙂

"Man goes into the self-help section of a bookstore. He says to the clerk:
Sounds like a lot of work. Got any somebody-else-helps-me books?"