I feel that I have no support system right now in my life.

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RIGHT NOW IN MY LIFE, I AM OUT ON A LIMB. I HAVE NO SUPPORT SYSTEM. MY DAD DIED IN MAY AND MY MOM IS IN REMISSION FROM LUNG CANCER AT PRESENT. MY FAMILY SEEMS TO BE IN SHAMBLES. WE JUST HAD THANKSGIVING AND NONE OF MY HUSBANDS KIDS BOTHERED TO ATTEND. THAT PUT MY HUSBAND IN A MOOD THAT HE IS STILL IN NEARLY A WEEK LATER. MY MOM IS ALWAYS DOWN ON ME ABOUT EVERYTHING I DO OR SAY. YET I AM THE ONE WHO HAS TO TAKE HER TO HER APPOINTMENTS AND SUCH. THE OTHER THREE SIBLINGS ARE ALWAYS BUSY AT JOBS AND DONT LIVE IN TOWN.
I LOST MY JOB A YEAR AGO AND BEING IN MY FIFTIES, EMPLOYERS JUST LOOK THROUGH ME AS IF I AM NOT THERE. MY UNEMPLOYMENT RAN OUT SO MY HUSBAND HARPS ON ME EVERYDAY ABOUT NOT PULLING MY SHARE OF THE LOAD. MY HUSBANDS MOM HAS CANCER STAGE 3 BREAST, LIVER AND BONE. HE IS THERE MOST NIGHTS TO HELP HOWEVER HE CAN. CHRISTMAS IS COMING UP AND I JUST DONT EVEN WANT TO DEAL WITH IT. I FEEL TIRED AND WORN OUT ALL THE TIME. I TRY EXERCISING, MEDITATION ETC. NOTHING SEEMS TO CLICK. AHEAD OF ME I ONLY SEE MORE OF THE SAME AND IT IS DEPRESSING. THERE ARE NO CLINICS AROUND SO WITHOUT ANY INSURANCE MY MEDICAL NEEDS ARE GOING BY THE WAYSIDE. I KNOW THERE ARE OTHERS WORSE OFF THAN ME AND I AM SILLY TO BE FEELING SORRY FOR MYSELF. BUT SOMETIMES IT JUST HELPS TO GRIPE. I FEEL LIKE THAT TREE FALLING IN AN EMPTY FORREST. NOBODY HEARS ME.

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Hello Oldest Daughter. Please. know that I am keeping you in my thoughts and prayers.I discovered this site a few hours ago and I am totally amazed at the amount of compassionate people gathered here....It is now 3:02 a.m. here on the east coast and I really need to go to bed and continue with this tomorrow.....I'm sure you must feel somewhat better just knowing that the support you will receive will be tremendous....I know that already.........Love and God Bless, Jan
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No problem Austin, I find sometimes the crazier I get, the more it helps me to get out of myself. God always makes sure there is energy left over for the important stuff. Like ya'll do for me. Hope you find some relief for your back soon. Let us know how things are going for you.
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Linden
Inever knew you were relocated after Rita and you were still able to encourage all of us. Thanks for passing on information,
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Oldest daughter, we hear you. There are agencies in your area who could help with your personal medical care.When I was relocated after Hurricane Rita, I had nothing. I called our City Hall and asked who could help me with my medication. They directed me to Indegent Care in our community. The very name of the orginization didn't make me feel very good, but the truth of my situation is I needed help. They were very nice and listened to my story and helped me and directed me to other orginizations that could help me get on my feet. I don't know what I would have done without their help. I'm sure there are places in your town that could help you. And my heart goes out to you for your situation. Keep posting, there are some very loving and wonderful people on this sight that will help lighten your load. Welcome
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Oldest daughter, you are not silly. I'm so glad you found this site. You will connect with others who know how you feel. None of us have the exact journey, but we have all traveled a similar road.

Try to find some respite from caregiving by going to your state aging services people. Just type your state name and "services" or "aging services" online, and you should find some links. You may get some phone numbers of agencies that can help you. Every state is different, but it's worth a try.
Carol
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Dear oldestdaughter,

I too am so sorry to hear you are struggling. Have you had a family gathering with your siblings to make some kind of arrangements for you and hubby to have time together or discuss some way that they can come and relieve you, even if it's just for a few hours on the weekend helps.

I'm too am the oldest of three and taking care of my Mother, after the death of our Father over a year and a half ago, because I chose to do this after my siblings expressed that they can't because of 'this or that reason' and I understood, but I explained to them that this was also their Mother as well and that they needed to take responsibility in her care and my sanity if I was to continue to be the soul caregiver of this situation. That helped tremendously to keep the communication open between the three of us and they are doing their part, when they can or even when I request them to help out in my time of need. Yes, I vent to them and that seems to keep them aware of what I am struggling through on a week to week basis.
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Dear oldestdaughter,

My heart goes out to you. Sometimes it seems as if the burden is too much. Hang in there. Has your husband called his children to find out why they did not attend Thanksgiving? Did they even call? I read a lot of the e-mails on the site and so many children seem to take a lot of abuse from their parents. I am lucky because my mother is not abusive. If she was I don't know what I would do. Have you tried talking to your mom and explaining how it upsets you when she "gets down on you"? Maybe she is lonely and afraid since the death of your father. Keep in touch. It helps just to vent.
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